Publishing Agent extraordinaire to Victor S E Moubarak and to many other famous writers who would rather I did not mention their names.
I have an important announcement to make.
Victor is still away and I do not know when he will return. He was last seen walking up the hill with a seagull perched on his left shoulder and a carrot on his right. On his head there was an orange and a banana.
I went to his office this morning. The curtains were drawn but the rest of the furniture was real. He had received a letter which must have made him cry; it was written on an onion. It read: "If it wasn’t for marriage people would have to argue with complete strangers. At least marriage keeps it within the family."
In the corner of the room there was a statue of Venus de Milo with her arms fully restored. I did not realise that she was playing the violin when she modelled for the statue. Thank Heavens for Velcro to keep her dress from falling down.
On his desk there was a note saying that the winner of the book competition is LULU and if she would contact him on firstname.lastname@example.org giving her postal address he would send her a book of her choice which he has written.
There was also a video on the desk with a note saying "Special Message to my leaders" ... or is it "readers"? I can't make out his writing.
Anyway, here's the video: