Saturday 28 July 2018

Hot Hot Hot

It's been hot in Britain ... and everywhere else it seems. Over here the temperature has gone up to 35 Degrees C in the shade. I was clever though, and did not stay in the shade.

The hot weather has brought with it many views and opinions and expected, or unexpected, behaviour.

Some say this is a sign of the end of time. The planet is getting warmer, this will melt the ice cap, the sea levels will go up ... and so on ... and on. Personally, I think that if the sea levels go up then more of us will live near the beach. A good thing, surely?

Here in the UK, as expected perhaps, the hot weather has affected traffic. Tarmacs on roads are melting. Long queues on motorways as cars break-down because of the heat. Trains and planes running late or not at all. Shortage of ice cream!!!!!

Did you hear me, folks? Shortage of ice cream? How can we possibly survive for a week or two without ice cream?

People are asking their employers to shut the business and send everyone home. We can't possibly work in this hot weather.

There should be a law about it. In fact, there should be a law about everything. We need more laws. That's what's wrong. There should have been a law against hot weather. Let's take God to Court for this hot weather. Let's blame Him for everything that's wrong in our lives.

Also, in this hot weather I notice there has been a tendency amongst people to divest more, or wear the very least they can manage within the realms of decency ... whatever that is. Peoples' inhibitions seem to disappear somehow. Men wear shorts with shoes or sandals with socks. Women wear shorter skirts or tiny shorts and boob tubes.

For those who don't know, a boob tube is an elasticated tiny piece of material worn around the breasts and defying gravity by hanging there for dear life. (See photo above).

Wearing such an outfit in public is one thing; but wearing it at work, as some people suggest?
 
Can you imagine me going to work and finding my lawyer, or accountant wearing a bikini? I wouldn't mind so much if our company lawyer was a young lady; but Mr Fortooth in a bikini?
Or elderly Miss Snodgrass in a swimming costume?
You can call me whatever names you like ... but I think this is the limit. I don't mind what people wear or don't wear on the beach. They can go totally naked if they want to. But not in the office surely? 

Now I just cannot wipe out the image of Mr Fortooth in a bikini from my mind. I shall never see him or Miss Snodgrass the same way again. 

In fact, I think our employer should close the business and send us all home until this hot weather spell is over.

22 comments:

  1. I see the real tragedy in the loss of ice cream. You can always turn a blind eye to the clothing. . .but NO ice cream! That's criminal. Wishing you a cooler weekend!

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    1. Thank you Cathy. It is so hot here that I think I'll loosen my tie just a little. But I'm still keeping my three-piece suit on!

      God bless.

      Delete
  2. Whoa, that's a bit warm for your environs, no? Before moving to Alabama, I'd scoff at your temps. (The mercury hit 121 f. the day I threw up my hands, deciding to get the heck out of Arizona.) Then again, our workplaces were so artificially chilled, most of us kept sweaters or light jackets.

    Your observation of about the polar caps' melting makes me chuckle. Ocean-front property, indeed!

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    1. It is indeed still very hot here, Mevely. We're having some winds shaking the fences between neighbours and bringing down dead dry leaves from the trees. It's Autumn already, it seems.

      Not all office buildings are air-conditioned. The thought of seeing Miss Snodgrass in a bathing suit will haunt me for ever!

      God bless you.

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  3. Sounds like someone needs to do an ice cream run NOW, it's toooo hot. :)

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    1. Indeed, Bill. How can we survive without ice cream?

      God bless.

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  4. We've had triple digit temps for weeks! And nothing is getting done around here. Grass is knee high (too hot outside to mow), etc. etc. Before this heat wave breaks we will need a hay baler!!

    Stay cool. Even if not in the shade.

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    1. It is so hot here, Anni, that seagulls and birds can't land because they burn their feet. A lot of old folks are busy knitting tiny shoes for the birds!

      God bless.

      Delete
  5. A guy in my neighborhood was riding around the street with a cooler strapped to the back of his bicycle - a cooler full of ice cream! I'll send him over.
    (And the figs? More water.)

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    1. Yes Chris, please send him over here. He will save Britain from starvation.

      I have tried watering the fig trees, Chris. It is so hot here that the water evaporates before it hits the ground! The fig trees hugged me in order to absorb any moisture I have.

      God bless.

      Delete
  6. FUNNY!!
    We've been having great weather. Summers here where I live are like one long spring. Today it was sunny and in the low 70's.

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    1. It is so hot here Happyone that we have long queues of people each allowed to enter the sea for five minutes to cool off.

      God bless you.

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  7. An ice cream shortage!!?? NOooooooo!!

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    1. Yes indeed, Terri. An ice cream shortage.

      God bless.

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  8. Well, thank goodness we finally got rain, and quite strong winds!
    But seriously an ice cream shortage! Goodness me!

    All the best Jan

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    1. Yes Jan, where I live it is getting desperate. No ice cream.

      We have a hose pipe ban. We are told to save water. I now drink whisky neat. They have also told us to share a bath with someone else. The family is on holiday abroad. So I asked a friend, Miss Ellis, to share a bath with me. I won't say what she said !!!

      God bless.

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    2. !!! I'm pleased you didn't share her words - Lol!

      Enjoy the remainder of the weekend, and hope the new week is a good one for you.

      All the best Jan

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    3. Thanx Jan. Best wishes to you and yours.

      God bless.

      Delete
  9. Whew, Victor, I'm sweating with you! And no ice cream? That is a travesty, indeed!
    Blessings!

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    1. I tell you it's bad here, Martha. The other day the street tarmac melted and I got stuck in the street as my feet became part of the tarmac. People thought I was statue of someone famous standing there. Namely me. But I am not at all famous. So it was a waste of time me being stuck there.

      God bless.

      Delete

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