I have a French friend called Antoine. I don't know why he's called Antoine. We all call him Tony. He lives in the UK but has gone home to France to see his parents. He asked me to look after his snail whilst he was away. Just one snail in a glass tank. I am to feed him lettuce leaves and some dandelion leaves every now and then.
The problem: Edouard, the snail has escaped. I did not know snails could be so fast. One night he was there in his tank and the next morning he was gone. We looked everywhere, starting with "where did you see him last?"
"In the tank!"
"Did you check there?"
"Of course I did, otherwise I would not have known that the snail is missing!"
An argument ensued. I was told not to be flippant. Meantime the snail had a head-start and escaped some more.
We searched some more. Every room. On top of cupboards, under cupboards, inside cupboards ... tables ... chairs ... TV ... fridge ...
We placed notices on lamp posts and trees in our street. The streets all around us. Even in shop windows.
"Snail Lost - looks like any other snail!"
The dilemma: Do we respond to several offers of ordinary garden snails people have picked up from their gardens? Do we pay a reward for finding Edouard? How do we know it is him? Will Tony realise it is not him when he returns from France?
What would you do? Confess to having lost Edouard or replace him with a fake one?
What is honesty? Is it always the best policy? Did Edouard have an Insurance Policy?
...most likely not!
ReplyDeleteget your magnifying glass and follow the slimy trail. LOL...Or better yet, just fess up!! Did you try whistling? I hear snails are really into slow jams!
ReplyDeleteI followed the slimy trail to the garden, I whistled and whistled. All the dogs in the district came to our garden; but no snail.
DeleteGod bless, Shug.
Go back and look again, you probably missed him!
ReplyDeleteWe looked everywhere, Sandie. Turns out this is a champion snail at snail racing; and Antoine uses it for breeding other racers. His parentage is impressive, (the snail, not Antoine - Antoine is as common as dirt). But the snail is the son of Speedy Gonzales a Spanish champion.
DeleteGod bless.
I had no idea that snails were escape artists, Victor. Maybe he's hiding under a lettuce leaf? Good luck finding him. God bless!
ReplyDeleteI didn't know either, Martha. We've looked everywhere. Bus stations, railway stations, ports and airports. He is nowhere.
DeleteGod bless.
Víctor, lo llamaría para decirle que se escapó.
ReplyDeleteAsí cuando llega su bronca estaría mas aplacado.
Siempre hay que ir de frente, dicen que las mentiras tienen patas cortas y quedaría mal al quedar la mentira al descubierto.
Besos
TRANSLATION: Victor, I'd call him to tell him he ran away.
DeleteThat way, when his anger comes, he'd be more calm.
You always have to be upfront. They say lies have short legs, and it would look bad if the lie were exposed.
Kisses.
You are right, Momentos. But this is a racing snail and Antoine would be very upset. God bless you.
Sorry for your loss, I have a feeling the grief will be slow!
ReplyDeleteBye! Thinking of you!
Good point, Jack ... as slow as a racing snail.
DeleteGod bless.
Maybe he ditched his shell so he couldn't be found. He wants to be free. :)
ReplyDeleteA snail in the NUDE ??? Really? Is it a snail? Is it a slug? Noooo it is a snail in the NUDE !!!
DeleteGod bless, Bill.
Was he, perhaps, lured by the offer of a warm buttery garlic bath?
ReplyDeleteNow there's a thought, Mevely! Poor Edouard ... part of a main course.
DeleteGod bless you always.
Never been snail hunt.
ReplyDeleteIt's nice to see you visiting here, Dora. Thank you so much. Please call again soon and often; and invite your friends too.
DeleteGod bless.