Electrifying

I went to the computer room a few days ago and switched on the lights. No light came on. I tried the switch on and off a few times ... click ... click ... still no light. Amazing how we take things for granted until they work no more. We get in the car and it starts first time, put the kettle on and the water boils, put bread in the toaster and it works properly, switch on the computer and it says, "System Error ... why don't you learn about computing you lazy beggar?"

Now I could write a whole post about taking things for granted. How we take each other for granted. How we even often take God for granted.

But I won't; because it was too dark in the computer room and I could not get to the computer without stubbing my foot against something.

I thought the light bulb must have died so I got another one to replace it; and I stubbed my toe against the chair as I got in the room in the dark.

Click ... click ... still no light.

OK ... try another light bulb, and this time wear some shoes. I hit my knee against the computer desk.

Click ... click ... still no light.

So I tried the three light bulbs in another room. They all worked OK.

Must be the switch that is faulty. That's one step too far for me. I was absent at University when they taught us how to change faulty switches.

I rang no fewer than thirteen electricians.

You notice I said no fewer; and not no less. That's because no fewer is the correct grammatical way of saying it. I did attend that University lesson.

Anyway, all electricians were busy, except the last one I phoned who agreed to attend within the hour. It is always the last one you phone who can attend; isn't it? Why couldn't one of the others attend? They would have been the last one much earlier!

The electrician tried the switch a few times ... click ... click ... no light. That's because there was no light bulb anyway. So he put a light bulb ... click ... click ... still no light. Another light bulb ... still no light.

"Must be a faulty switch!" he said. He'd obviously attended that particular University lesson about identifying whether the switch is faulty.

"I'll need to change the switch!" he said, "only I haven't got one."

Can you imagine? An electrician with a van full of all sorts of equipment and wires and electrical type things; but no switch. He must have missed that lesson I suppose.

I remembered I had a spare switch in the garage in a tool box somewhere. He said it would fit perfectly as a replacement and offered to buy it from me for £2.

"Why?" I asked.

"So I can fit it in your room," he said, "and it'll save me having to go to the store and buy a switch for you!"

"But why not fit my switch, which you said is OK, for free? Just charge me for your time to do the job!" I said.

"Can't do that," he replied, "it says here on the invoice I have to give you, 'Parts', that's the price of the parts I use, that's the switch. And 'Labour', that's the cost of my time to do the job. Then I add both for 'Total'. So I can't give you an invoice with 'Labour' only. How can I do any job without parts, like the switch, or wires and so on?"

I was too tired to argue and I needed the lights on to write this Blog post for you. So I sold him my switch for £2 as agreed.

Half an hour later he'd finished the job.

He gave me an invoice which said 'Parts' £10 and 'Labour' £25; TOTAL £35.

"Why did you charge me £10 for the switch which you bought from me for £2?" I asked.

"Because that's the price I would have paid at the store!" he replied, looking at me as if I'm an idiot.

"But you did not go to the store," I protested, "I saved you the drive, and the cost of gas getting there, and the travelling time which would not have been included in the invoice. So if anything I saved you a lot of money by selling you the switch which I was prepared to give you for free to start with, because it was mine anyway!"

He said, "Sorry mate. The normal invoice for this kind of work is £10 for the switch, and £25 for my time to do the work. You should not have sold me the switch for £2. You should have insisted on £10!"

As I said, I was too tired to argue. I gave him the £35.

MORAL OF THE STORY:

Do not take logic for granted.

More important - do not take God for granted.