He jumped off his chair, switched off the record player and said sotto voce, “OK … hold it there all of you … we’ll return to this piece presently …”
He opened the door to be confronted by Sister Martha.
“I’m not interrupting anything?” she asked.
“Oh … only Giuseppe Verdi …” he replied.
“Yes … I’ve heard him through the open window … he’s getting better under your leadership … mind if I come in?”
He moved aside and let her in.
“Would you like tea or coffee …” she said as she made her way towards the kitchen.
“Tea please,” replied the priest as he walked back to the living room.
Sister Martha was in her late sixties yet she was as youthful and energetic as anyone half her age. She lived at the Convent nearby with a dozen other nuns, and she taught at the local Catholic schools. She often called in on the priests at St Vincent for a chat and a cup of tea on her way home, especially on Fridays when she stayed a little late at the school.
Moments later she entered the living room carrying a tray of tea and ginger biscuits; the priest’s favorite, as she knew very well.
“Ah … I didn’t know we had ginger biscuits,” said Father Ignatius, “I didn’t find them earlier on when I looked …”
“Mrs Davenport has shown me where she hides them …” said Sister Martha pouring two cups of tea, “she told me if you’d find them you’ll finish the whole packet …”
A few minutes of silence later as they slowly sipped their tea Sister Martha was first to break the quiet.
“Ignatius … have you heard about Sister Cecilia?” she asked.
“No … I can’t say I have …” he replied, “what’s the problem …”
“I am not breaking any confidences Ignatius … she asked me to speak to you … she’s already spoken to Mother Superior today …”
“Sounds ominous …” said the priest putting his cup down.
“Well … she works at the hospital as you know … she’s a nursing assistant there … well, not to put too fine a point on it … she’s fallen in love with a young doctor there …
“She told me she doesn’t know how it happened …” continued Sister Martha, “they got attracted to each other and she feels she can no longer continue her vocation …”
“You say she spoke to Mother Superior?” asked Father Ignatius.
“Yes … today. She told her she’d been thinking about this for about a month or so … she wishes it didn’t happen but it has … she wants to leave the convent and pursue a new life with him …
“She told me that Mother Superior was very understanding and suggested that she leaves the Convent for another one down South to give her time to think …
“But Sister Cecilia doesn’t think it will help … she wants to leave her vocation altogether.”
“I see …” said the priest calmly, “and you say Cecilia asked you to speak to me …”
“Yes … she wanted your advice …”
Father Ignatius smiled weakly.
“The poor soul …” he mumbled, “what advice can I give her Martha?” he asked rhetorically.
“When we decide to take up our vocation to serve the Lord,” he continued, “we do so after a lot of soul-searching, a lot of prayers, and a lot of training. It takes years as you know Martha … this is perhaps deliberate to give us a chance to think seriously on what we’re doing and the commitment we’re undertaking …
“Yet … despite all that … it does sometimes happen as in this case, that individuals can no longer continue their vocations and wish to leave. It happened some years ago to a priest I knew well … he has left the church and is now married with a family of his own …”
“It’s terrible …” Sister Martha said quietly.
“I suppose it is …” he replied, “as a Church we frown when people break their marital vows and divorce or separate … and I suspect this is no different …
“When a priest or nun break their vows and no longer wish to continue their vocations … it is perhaps the same as couples seeking divorce …
“Yet Martha … whilst I understand what people like Cecilia or that priest I spoke of are going through … I cannot condemn them …”
The nun looked up at him with a frown.
“I cannot condemn them, Martha …” he repeated, “I agree that it is wrong to break the vows they made freely … but at the same time … who am I to stand in the way of true and genuine love … if that is what’s happened in this case. I know it was exactly what happened in the case of that priest … I knew him very well.
“He fell in love with a teacher … he shouldn’t have … but he did … He wanted to leave the Church … just like Cecilia … He confessed to me … it was heart breaking … he told me he could not go on serving as a priest.”
“What did you do?” asked Sister Martha.
“I forgave him of course …” replied Father Ignatius, “how could I possibly withhold absolution … He was repentant and he knew that he could no longer serve as a priest … even if he gave up his lover and was moved to another Parish … He knew that he would not be a good priest and that deep in his heart he’d be a fraud … He’d be serving against his will and would be cheating the Church as well as God Himself …
“Yes …” said Father Ignatius thinking back to that event in the distant past, “I forgave him and absolved him …
“When we forgive someone else, we touch his very soul with the merciful love of Jesus Christ our Lord. How could I stand in the way of such love?
“Eventually … the bishop let him go … and as I said, he’s now married with a family.”
“What do you want me to say to Cecilia?” asked Sister Martha.
“Tell her that I’ll be praying for her …” he replied, “tell her to think about what Mother Superior advised … and that I’ll be always available if she wishes to have a talk with me … How old is she?” he asked.
“Thirty … last month!”
“She’s young and no doubt very frightened …” said Father Ignatius calmly, “I believe that whatever we do … our role is not to condemn but to forgive … She is doing what she feels is right for her life …
“Our Lord forgave many sins when He walked this earth … who am I to stand in the way of true repentance?”
MORE FATHER IGNATIUS STORIES HERE
...as a young boy I remember nuns in their black and habits. As I often say, they seem to have aged out!
ReplyDeleteYes, I remember nuns used to dress as above.
DeleteGod bless, Tom.
Blessings Victor.
ReplyDeletewww.rsrue.blogspot.com
God bless, Regine.
DeleteAnother touching and lovely Fr. Ignatius story. Thanks, Victor, for blessing us all with your words today!
ReplyDeleteThank you, Martha. I have known a number of priests who have left their vocation to get married.
DeleteGod bless.
A heartfelt story. I do have to say, my husband was Catholic, went to Catholic schools through college, but he is not Catholic now.
ReplyDeleteSometimes people have difficulty in their beliefs. Praying for you and yours Chatty Crone. God bless.
DeleteI remember having a few young nuns as a teacher way back then. They were there at a time when the habits were changing and they could wear regular clothes, like a dress. It felt strange back then to see the change happening right then.
ReplyDeleteYes, I remember those times, Bill. I wonder whether it was a good idea to allow a change of habit to ordinary clothes.
DeleteGod bless always.
I thought for a moment the wise Father I. was remembering another lost love. Intimately.
ReplyDeleteIf you don't mind me asking, does the Church take into account (when) a priest or a nun simply, without intention, changes his/her mind, their values? I know I scarcely resemble the same person I was at 24 or 34. Thank you, Victor!
Ah ... memories of my book "To Love a Priest" when Fr I had to face the very question you ask, Mevely. Have you read it?
DeleteAs for your second question - very interesting. To become a priest it takes about seven years of preparation and study. At this time, one would expect an individual to have considered his vocation properly; and so would his superiors training him. That said, I have known four priests who have left the Church to get married. They were aged in their mid 30s at the time. I asked a priest about this once and compared it to the Catholic Church's views on divorce. He explained that the Church had to be pragmatic and that in some cases people do change their views/circumstances and (like in divorce) the Church had to be sympathetic and forgiving.
This is a difficult question for the Catholic Church (explored further in my book above). Challenging at a time when new vocation numbers are far less than years ago. Also complicated by the fact that the Catholic Church has now welcomed in its midst previously Anglican married priests who have converted to Catholicism. So we have the situation, here locally, where a church has two priests - one celibate and unmarried, and another married with children and grandchildren. The celibate priest lives in Parish House. The married one lives with his family in a house he previously owned.
God bless you, Mevely. Thank you fro your very interesting questions.
Thank you so much for your thoughtful and candid response, Victor. Yes, I have this book in my Kindle library. It may have been the first (of yours) that I downloaded ... hence, time for a refresher read.
DeleteMany thanx Mevely. Indeed, the Catholic Church has many problems to resolve regarding priests and celibacy.
DeleteBest wishes and God bless always.
Hurray for love --- and kindness always.
ReplyDeleteGod bless, CM.
DeleteAll I got to say my friend, I wish you were as wise my friend Father I. If you work on it you can probably improve. I suggest you talk to him. Just sayin',
ReplyDeleteLove from this side. as always, I enjoyed the read....
You're always so kind to me, Jack. Thank you so much. When I write these articles and books I try my best to research difficult questions like the one discussed above. The Church, (and the world) are going through very difficult times right now.
DeleteGod bless you and your family always.
Growing up I can remember seeing groups of nuns in their black habits often shepherding students to school or Church, sometimes when visiting a museum. In these more modern times it's not seen so often.
ReplyDeleteAll the best Jan
I remember nuns dressed as you say, Jan. This is no longer so these days.
DeleteGod bless you.
It is hard to make these decisions. You've written a very beautiful, gentle story.
ReplyDeleteThank you, Mimi. God bless.
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