Interesting Facts

Here are some interesting facts you may be interested in. 

Hence the title of this post

INTERESTING FACTS.

Did you know that the chair was invented by an ancient Roman called Kevin Sedes? His mother was English from Birmingham UK and insisted he is called Kevin.

In ancient Rome people used to lie down on couches to eat their meals. Apparently this is not good for the digestion and it was also somewhat untidy with food being picked up by hand and falling everywhere on the couch.

Then one day Kevin invented the chair and sold the idea, as well as the chair, to the emperor Gluteus Maximus.

For years thereafter, all well to do families in ancient Rome sat on chairs to eat their dinner. Unfortunately, the table had not yet been invented so they had to put the food on the floor and bend down from their chairs to pick it up. Many Romans fell off their chairs whilst eating and drinking wine.

Prior to the invention of the chair, Roman chariots of course had no chairs in them. Roman soldiers used to stand on the chariot instead. Which explains why chariots had no roofs either. Unfortunately, the standing driver used to hit his head against low branches as the chariots raced along. That is why in the 1959 film Ben-Hur, (as opposed to Ben-Him), in the chariot race we see Charlton Heston going round and round the arena and there are no trees.

And now for something completely different. From ancient Rome we move to modern day Britain.

Moving on swiftly to the UK. Do you know that we still have a class system of sorts? Although most people would deny it they most probably consider themselves as either upper class, middle class or working class. Except me ... I am in a class of my own. At school it was called detention.

I remember when at school some years ago I was talking to my friend in class and the teacher threw a piece of chalk at me. He said, "That'll teach you to talk in class. The exams are next week, if you don't pay attention you'll go down in History!"

He was right. I have gone down in History, and Geography, and Maths and ... anyway; back to the British class system.

A distinguishing feature of the upper-class people in Britain is the way they speak. Upper-class people tend to speak in a posh accent, don't you know, by Jove, what? Old boy and all that.

In the school I went to we had quite a few upper-class kids. In fact it was a school of mixed backgrounds with sons and daughters of stock-brokers, bankers and doctors as well as accountants and plumbers and electricians.

Funny how my memory takes me back to those days of childhood. As a child I had sticking out ears. I looked like a car with its doors open. I was always called "Big Ears" like the character in the Enid Blyton books about Noddy. I was also called Dumbo after the flying elephant with big ears. It's sad how one's parents can be cruel, isn't it?

But as I grew up my ears got into proportion with the rest of my body ... my head!

In fact I became quite handsome. I even got a girl-friend. She was called Stella. She was blonde and very sexy. I remember once for her birthday I asked her what she wanted as a special present. She looked at me with a glint in her eyes and said she wanted a sexy thong!

So I sang, "Strangers in the night ..."

Nope ... didn't happen ... must have been her accent.

Back to the class system.

Upper class people tend to be born in that class, and are not necessarily elevated to it through wealth.

The middle-classes tend to be people who aspire to be better than the rest and look down on others because they themselves have a better education, better professional jobs, they live in large houses with more than one car and make it obvious by their behaviour that although they are not not upper class they are definitely not lower class, also known as working class.

For example, if they cut their finger they would claim that it was done whilst opening an oyster and not a can of baked beans.

I suppose you can also tell what "class" people belong to by the newspapers they read. Either a tabloid easy to handle paper; or a broad-sheet with plenty of financial and economic facts rather than pictures and cartoons. I tend to read comics because they are more serious and truthful than newspapers.

Speaking of reading, did you know that once I spent the whole day looking for my book about chameleons. It was so well camouflaged I could not find it.

We have a lot of books at home. Mostly scientific and history books. We're a well educated family. We all learnt to read at an early age by identifying the letters in our alphabet pasta shapes as we ate. Except a cousin of mine who was dyslexic; so his parents gave him spaghetti instead.

My family descends from a scientific line you know. My uncle Rufus discovered the East Pole I'll have you know. Surprisingly enough, it was not in the East as you would imagine but in fact in the opposite direction in the West. But he thought it was the East Pole because he had lost his compass that day and did not know whether he was coming or going.

Another uncle of mine, uncle Baltazar, he discovered Nocturnal Reversal. It is a condition that occurs every now and then to people. He was staying overnight at a hotel and went to bed as usual. The next morning he felt very hot. And I mean very hot. He almost had a fever that hot he was. It was that temperature between being very hot and actually having a fever.

He woke up and found he was under the mattress. He was still in bed but the mattress was on top of him. Took him ages to get out of bed.

And that's what's known as Nocturnal Reversal. What did you think it was?

Uncle Baltazar says it is a more common condition than people think. He suggests you tie one leg to the bed post in case it happens to you and then people will be able to find you in the morning. Just one leg will do. No need to overdo it!

Speaking of bed activities ... ehm ... sorry, my mind wondered for a second or more. To get back to the subject ... did you know that apparently a lot of people take their pets with them in bed at night? What do you think about that?

I once took my pet with me to bed. The next morning my bed was totally soaking wet, and my goldfish had died.

Anyway, back to books. We have at home many Self-Help books.

My favourite is "How To Alienate Friends and Annoy People". Since reading it I have got rid of many friends in my life. People who used to bother me and always come round uninvited to eat my biscuits, drink my tea and borrow my lawnmower.

Another good book I'd recommend is "The Power Of Negative Thinking". It teaches you what life is all about. One long and hard struggle and a series of failures punctuated by bouts of disappointments. There's no point in complaining and bothering people with your bad luck stories. Just suck it up and get on with it you wimp!

One good thing about being negative in life is that if things turn out OK you'd be pleasantly surprised. And if they don't you can say to everyone, "I told you so!"

Also worth reading is "The Encyclopaedia of Insults". This has proved useful many times in life when people got on my nerves.

I would say things like, "Were you born that boring or did you train for it?" or "And from whose nose were you picked?"

Other examples of good insults are, "What you don't know would make a good book", "If they can make penicillin out of mouldy bread, they sure can make something out of you", "What you lack in intelligence, you make up for it in stupidity", or "I never liked you and I always will".

So there you have it. Some interesting facts and book recommendations too. What else do you expect from an excellent Blog? I think I'll start reading it. Why don't you recommend your friends to join us here for some good company and edification?