Tuesday, 9 July 2024

To sleep, perchance to dream

 
Do you ever dream that you are high up somewhere and about to fall? It happens to me sometimes, especially after a few drinks before bedtime.

I have now found a remedy. I have fitted an old seat belt from a car to the bed and I tie myself in before going to sleep. The problem is when I get up in a hurry to go to the bathroom. I can never find the confounded release clip of the belt in time. I once rushed to the bathroom carrying the whole mattress and my wife with me.

Do you have your pet in bed with you? Some people says it relaxes them. I tried it once. I had my pet with me in bed and in the morning the bed was soaking wet and my goldfish had died.

I normally sleep with my glasses on so that I can see my dreams much clearer. How about you? Are your dreams in colour or black and white? Mine are techni-colour with stereo sound-surround.

The other day my wife hit me because of the way I behaved in her dream. I don't think that's fair, do you? She interrupted my exotic dream with ...

I used to count sheep when I could not sleep. Now I lay awake wondering about the price of lamb in the shops. Why is it so expensive?

I never know what time I go to sleep. I lay there in bed thinking and then suddenly I am asleep. Do you know precisely when you actually fall asleep?

And then you wake up. Usually you wake up in a different mood each day. Sometimes in the morning I wake up grumpy. At other times I leave her sleeping and get down and make breakfast.

I often bring her a cup of tea in the morning in my pyjamas. She's never grateful. She prefers it in a cup.

Some people like to sleep in their pyjamas. Others in their night-dress whilst others sleep in the nude; which can be hilarious if you wake up and see yourself in the mirror.

In England some people sleep naked but with their hat on. Just in case they meet someone in their dreams and they can take the hat off by way of salutation.

How about you? Do you sleep with your hat on?

One day some Angels were looking out of the window in Heaven and counting, "One ... two ... three, four ... five ... six ..."

Jesus came by and asked them, "What are you doing?"

They said, "We are counting how many people thank God as soon as they wake up for seeing them safely through the night!"


20 comments:

  1. Sweet Victor: Thank-you for another post giving me a good belly laugh.
    God has Blessed you with a great sense of humor.

    Catherine

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    1. Thank you Catherine. It is good to laugh. It releases dolphins within us. I read it in a medical book I am writing.

      God bless.

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  2. ...that picture has always amazed me. God meant for both of my feet to be on the ground!!!

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    1. Have you considered putting glue on the soles of your shoes?

      God bless, Tom.

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  3. You should see the big smile on my face right now! One good one after another. YOu've outdone yourself. Keep smiling and carry on my friend. We all need to smile.

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    1. It makes me so happy when my readers enjoy my writings, Sandy. Thank you so much. Please invite others here so we can share the smiles.

      God bless you.

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  4. LOL, were you a comedian or played one on a stage. :)

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    1. Yes Bill. Years ago I used top write comedy sketches and put on variety shows on the stage for charity. We played in a number of venues in London and elsewhere. I used to present the various acts like singing, opera, pop, playing musical instruments and of course comedy sketches.

      See: https://timeforreflections.blogspot.com/search?q=ersa

      God bless.

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  5. WHAT an imagination you have, Mr. Moubarak!!!

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    1. Enjoy the humour and share, Barbara.

      God bless.

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  6. The last story about the angels is priceless, Victor. I have two needlepoint stitched examples of that prayer done by my great-grandmother when she was eight-years-old. Priceless! Maybe, I see a blog in my future???
    Blessings!

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    1. Yes Martha. Do write a Blog post showing the needlepoint stitched prayers. What a lovely souvenir.

      God bless.

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  7. Such a great close! It reminds me of a favorite quote: "God gave you a gift of 86,400 seconds today. Have you used one to say, 'thank you'?"

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    1. Indeed, how often we forget to thank the Lord.

      God bless always, Mevely.

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  8. 😊
    ---Cheerful Monk

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  9. Oh, those were all so funny. My favorite was "rushed to the bathroom carrying the whole mattress and my wife with me." Too funny.

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    1. I am so glad you enjoyed my fantasy humour Debby. Keep smiling always my friend.

      God bless you.

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  10. I do try to thank Him for waking me as soon as I get up, but sometimes I have to run to the loo straight away and I forget until after. I hope it still counts!

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    1. Yes, of course it still counts; as long as you don't drag the mattress with you.

      God bless, Mimi.

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