Thursday 29 July 2021

High Class Do

 

Have you ever been to one of those high-class posh types of dances, or parties, where the men dress in penguin suits with bow ties, and the women normally have very tight revealing low cut dresses showing their bosoms?

I remember going to such an event years ago in London. I just found the "program" they gave us at the time. Yes, a beautifully printed on quality paper program of events, with the names of all those attending listed there. 

It was a really high-class birthday celebration for a friend of mine at the time. It was held at a top hotel where a man in a bright red uniform would announce your arrival as soon as you got in, and everyone would turn round to see your entrance and greet you with a smile; or in my case, total indifference and disdain.

"Ladies and Gentlemen, please welcome Mr Victor Moo ... Moo ..." he stuttered, not being able to pronounce my name, nor having the wit or inclination to check how to pronounce it beforehand.

I whispered my name quietly.

"Whatever," he said as I got in and no one cared. 

I noticed a man a short distance away, with a beautiful young lady, turn round, look at me and snigger with derision.

That's when I gave way to the devil at my side. I made a bee-line towards him, walking like Groucho Marx used to, and when I got there I said, "Hello Mr eh ... hmmm ... I'm so sorry. I make a point never to forget a name or a face, but in your case I make an exception. I hope this gorgeous lady will bother to remember you better than me; but somehow I doubt she likes cockroaches!"

Then before he had a chance to say anything, I left and walked straight to the bar where I met the birthday boy and his friends. They were really down to earth lovely people who greeted me like a star. The birthday boy, or man, apologised for the announcer's faux-pas and was genuinely most hurt at my treatment.

I'm reading some of the names from the program of events which I've just found amongst my papers.

There was Mrs Madeleine Byteme-Legg, with her husband Professor Thomas Legg. Apparently she insisted upon keeping her maiden name when they got married.

From Stirling in Scotland there was Mr and Mrs Strapp with their young son Jock Strapp.

Mr and Mrs Lear with their daughter Crystal-Shandi.

Also there was the famous opera singer Melissa Tone with her husband Barry Tone.

I recognised my old friends Mr and Mrs Dover with their daughter Eileen. I remember she had a REALLY low cut dress. She'd been on a peanut and melons diet. The peanuts did not have any effect on her figure, however ...

Brigadier Turner arrived late. On his journey to the hotel his car crashed into two houses side by side belonging to old friends of his, John and Mary Ball, and Robert and Helena Jones. What are the chances of that happening? The car nearly caught fire but luckily he was pulled out of the car by the Joneses.

Looking at all these names brings back memories of old friends and acquaintances like Mr and Mrs Stick and their daughter Ella. To call her a friend would be stretching it a bit; but she was good fun until I made a snap decision to end it all.

I also recall the somewhat superstitious couple who always tried to anticipate every eventuality. What was their name ... oh here it is in the program. Mr And Mrs Case and their son Justin. 

I don't know about you, but I am not superstitious. Just a little stitious at times. For instance, I would never walk under a black cat. 

What a party and what an evening that was. I wonder if you were also there and at the time we had not met each other and get acquainted. Do you remember anyone else at that party?

Oh ... by the way. That man who sniggered at me when I arrived. His luck soon ran out. I went out with the lady he was with at the time. We became good friends!!!

21 comments:

  1. I've read your post. Such an insteresting story happened, specially in the end. I mean the lady of the guy who sniggered at you. I was laughing because of this. Thanks...

    ReplyDelete
  2. ,,,nope! I am not a high class type of guy!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I was invited. Had to get a penguin suit.

      God bless, Tom.

      Delete
  3. Dearest Victor,
    There is so much truth in your story and yes, some people are way too full of themselves!
    The black cat superstition is something sad!
    A good writer friend (who is very ill herself) did explain it so well in her excellent book. She also is a blog writer: https://catwoodsporchparty.wordpress.com/2013/06/12/black-cats-in-sun-and-shade-a-painters-eye-view/
    We have had more than six black kitties and there is nothing wrong or even superstitious with them. Lovely companions, especially Barty Boy the one we lost in October 2020. If ALL people would be that sweet...
    Hugs,
    Mariette

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Thank you Mariette. I shall visit your Blog friend right now. Black cats can be very nice. The neighbours have one that comes in our garden. I hate it when they do their business in our garden and I have to clean it up.

      God bless.

      Delete
    2. 😳 Victor, if you have to clean up, then it must be from a dog. We have five kitties and we never ever have found anything in our garden. They bury everything and are in fact very clean and meticulous! So it must be something else...

      Delete
    3. Thanx Mariette. I'll keep a look out to see who it could be.

      God bless.

      Delete
  4. Ugh. I loathe people like that self-important snigger-er. Good for his former lady friend!
    As ever, I'm enjoying your characters' names. (Have to admit, I had to say a few out-loud before the light came on in my brain.)

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. It took me ages to think up all the characters' names. I was concerned some readers may not approve. Glad I made you smile, Mevely.

      God bless always.

      Delete
  5. The names are just too funny, Victor! How did you get to be so clever?
    Blessings!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I'm not clever at all, Martha. I just try to cheer myself up with humour when I'm feeling down.

      God bless always.

      Delete
  6. No I was never invited to one of those 'Up in the Papers' affairs. I don't even get invited to class reunions, since I was a drop out.. LOL You had me worried about the Brigadier, glad the Jones' were able to get him there. Mostly glad you became good friends with Whatsher name. I like a good ending.
    From myt heart, Thanks for the prayers,
    Sherry & jack wishing for another trip to your side of the water.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Thank you for your kindness Jack & Sherry. I've only been to one of these type of dances. Never to a school or college reunion. I'm not so sure I would go if invited. I'd guess it would be an occasion for people to compare how well they did in life.

      God bless you both always.

      Delete
    2. There is always someone in the crowd snide enough to humiliate others. I believe them to be insecure and no one ever told them that you can't build up the weak by tearing down the strong. I liked the girlfriend though. The names on the guestlist we hilarious. As usual, you evoked a whoop of laughter from me. Thank you, Victor. God Bless.

      Delete
    3. Thank you once more for your visit and comments, Nells. Much appreciated. I find that humour tends to lighten every difficult situation. Although perhaps I was a little rude to that man. I enjoyed thinking up those guests names. Glad you liked them.

      God bless always.

      Delete
  7. I see what you did with those names there, very funny. Sadly I remember my daughter's graduation dance from Primary school, where most of the kids were twelve or barely thirteen and many of the girls wore such dresses as you have described! I don't know how their mothers could allow it and the amount of makeup on some of their faces was just too much. My daughter's party dress, hand made by me, looked childish in comparison, but at 12 that's what she was.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I enjoyed making up those guest names. Such fancy dos are only an opportunity for some people to show off. I only attended the once.

      God bless, River.

      Delete
  8. While i've been to a couple of tuxedo events, it has never been so high class they announce your arrival. They would mess up my last name, too, they always do, so you have my sympathy.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I feel uncomfortable on tuxedo suits.

      God bless, Mimi.

      Delete

I PRAY FOR ALL WHO COMMENT HERE.

God bless you.