Dogs in my life

 

Before I was born my parents had a little dog. I've been told that when I was born my parents were happy because I was almost as cute as the dog. They named me after him because I shook myself left and right like a dog does to dry himself. 

My parents were prepared for my arrival because they brought with them in hospital one of those small carrier cages people use to carry pets. The doctor and nurses were concerned. They asked, "have you got a dog at home?" When my parents said YES, they said, "make sure you don't neglect the dog now you have a baby!"

At home the dog and I enjoyed many meals together. I preferred the tinned dog food to those dry pellets. We often went to the park and my dad used to throw a stick and see who would get it first.

One day whilst out in the park my dad lost the dog. He was broken-hearted. I suggested he puts an advert in the newspaper, also posters all over the area which he could stick on trees, notice boards and such like. A few days later and he still did not find his dog. I asked him what he had written on the advert and posters. He replied, "Here boy!"

We eventually found our dog two days later. He was OK. Our neighbour, an old man, was so envious of us that he must have got a dog too.  He chose a silly name for his dog, I thought. He called him "Help!"

I remember soon afterwards I could hear the old man calling "Help! Help!" in his garden. Eventually, he must have found him because he stopped calling. The next morning, whilst I was out buying a newspaper, I saw an ambulance outside the old man's house. I wondered why but never found out.

As I grew up my love for dogs continued. I worked for a charity for homeless dogs. I volunteered to do a parachute jump to raise funds for the charity. People sponsored me.

On the day itself TV and the Press were there to see us take off. We took an Alsatian dog in the plane with us. The intention was that I would parachute with an expert parachutist strapped behind me, (or I in front of him). He would do all the guidance and open the parachute at the right time. As I was getting ready to jump the dog ran at me and pushed me out of the plane. We both fell with the dog hanging on my back. I pulled the cord but nothing happened. I was pulling the dog's lead. Eventually I pulled the right cord and landed safely on my stomach on the ground below. The dog ran away off my back to the nearest tree to relieve himself. I did not wait to find a tree.

When we lived in London a friend of ours asked if we could look after their dog whilst they go away for the weekend. It’s a white Labradoodle; a cross between a Labrador and a poodle. It looks like a big sheep with fluffy white fur. It’s called “Koocheekoo”.

As soon as we got out for a walk he started bouncing and galloping as if he was fitted with springs on its legs. We walked up our street and then we stopped on the edge of the side-walk to cross the road. He stood on his back legs and tried to lick my face. I gently got him down again and waited for a gap in the traffic so we could cross. As I looked left and right for enough space in the traffic to cross the road the stupid creature lifted his back leg and did his business on my leg.

I lifted my right leg, almost as a reflex action to see the damage done to my trousers when, at that very instant, the dog noticed a cat some distance away and made a run for it. He caught me off-guard and off-balance … I dropped flat sideways like a felled tree. I held on tight to the lead whilst the dog was pulling hard, standing on its hind legs, and barking its head off to attract the attention of every passer-by. It was at that point, whilst lying flat on the ground, that I noticed that my nose was only inches away from another solid deposit left there by another dog.

Yes, thinking back, dogs have always been part of my life. I love them so. 

This morning at work I found my secretary crying because her small dog had died. It broke my heart seeing her so miserable so I went out and bought her an identical dog. Now she has two dead dogs.

 

NOTE: Humour only. No dogs, doctors, nurses, old neighbours or anyone or anything else have been harmed in the writing of this story. All characters and situations are fictitious and any similarities to persons, animals or situations are purely coincidental.