English as it is spoke

 

Believe it or not, the two people above are speaking English ... or is it Scottish ... or Australian?

The English language seems to have developed and changed through time as well as geography. In the UK we say chips to mean fried sticks of potatoes, (French fries), and in the USA it means those crispy slices of potatoes which we call crisps. We say lift, you say elevator. We say petrol you say gas ... and so on.

Even in the UK, a small island just North of Europe the size of a postage stamp, we have different meanings for the same words. And different accents too. 

Up in Scotland we have different accents in Edinburgh and in Glasgow, a distance of just a few miles, (or inches if viewed on the map). 

Then we also have Welsh and Irish accents as well as the many accents in England itself. Someone from Liverpool would sound totally different than from Manchester, or from Birmingham, Norfolk, Cornwall or London. In fact in London you'd find different accents depending from which part of London you come from.

Here are some Scottish words and their meaning:

You ken - you know.

Braw - excellent or pleasant.

Dreich - dreary, dull or gloomy.

Eejit – Idiot (this word is also used in Ireland).

Canny – Careful, or sometimes Clever

Dinnae – Don’t

I’ll gie ye a skelpit lug – I’ll give you a slap on the ear!

Yer bum’s oot the windae - actual translation: ‘your bottom is out of the window’; meaning You are talking rubbish, or even You’re not making any sense.

And now some Cockney London Rhyming Slang.

Adam and Eve - meaning "believe" - Would you Adam and Eve it? (Would you believe it?)

Apples and Pears - meaning "stairs" - He went up the apples and pears.

Barney Rubble - meaning "trouble" - He is real Barney Rubble he is!

Brahms and Liszt - meaning "pissed" (drunk) - He came out of the pub totally Brahms and Liszt.

Bristol - short for a football team called Bristol City - which rhymes with titty meaning breast. So you would say - She had some large Bristols on her. Or, look at those Bristols.

Butcher's - short for butcher's hook - rhyming with and meaning "look" - Let me have a butchers at it. (Let me look at it).

Dog and bone - phone. I spoke to her on the dog and bone. She said her dog's meat (feet) hurt her and she had an itch on her fireman's hose (nose) and a pain in her Gregory Peck (neck). She went out and crossed the frog and toad (road) to fetch her dustbin lid (kid). When he got home, her dustbin lid (kid) was Hank Marvin (starving) and wanted feeding; but he said he wanted a Jimmy Riddle (piddle = urinate) first. So he went up the apples and pears - or tables and chairs (stairs) and pointed Percy to the porcelain (pointed his man bits to the porcelain urinal or toilet). She called him down but he must have been Mutt and Jeff (deaf) at the time because he didn't answer her.

She heard him wash his hands with a bit of Bob Hope (soap) and then he had a bread and cheese (sneeze) because he was coming down with a cold. He sat in front of the custard and jelly (telly = TV) and watched the baked bean (queen) give her Christmas address to the nation.

Enough Cockney Rhyming Slang for now. I'll say goodbye and go to the trouble and strife (wife) in the hope that she's got a Vera Lynn (gin) ready for me.

Tara now!