Friday 19 April 2013

Mathematical Matters



Mathematics is all about numbers and the relationships of numbers to one another. For example, do you know that there are more stars and planets in the universe than all the grains of sands in all the beaches and deserts in the world?

Without telling you the number of stars the mere image I have depicted has conjured in your mind how many stars exist.

There are indeed many grains of sands in the desert. I should know.

I was once a member of a research team in the desert and my task was to count the number of grains of sands. I counted up to 23 and got tired. So I can categorically claim that there are more than 23 grains of sand in the world and more stars than that in the universe. Just look up to the sky at night to prove it.

The Ancient Greeks were great mathematicians. Pythagoras for instance used mathematics to work out the measurements of shapes, especially triangles. He found out that the square on a hippopotamus is bigger than two other squares in the bush. He also had great respect for flava beans as he thought they were the source of life itself. One day he was chased by his enemies and he came across a field of beans. He stopped and refused to go through it and was killed by his enemies.

Archimedes was another mathematician of sorts. He was having a bath one day and the water in his bath overflowed. He ran in the street naked shouting “Eureka” and was arrested for indecent exposure.

One day I was traveling on a train with my college professor of mathematics. The train was going fast and we passed a field full of sheep. He remarked “Look over there, 134 sheep!”

I was impressed and asked him how he counted them so quick with the train traveling so fast. He replied “Easy … I counted their legs and divided by four!”

A bit later we passed another field full of sheep and I tried the same trick. I counted the legs and divided by four; but I had a remainder of three. Which means there was either one sheep with three legs, or three sheep with one leg each!

The Ancient Romans, unlike the Greeks, used letters instead of numbers. The letter I meant one, II meant two, III meant three … they then got tired and tried something different. IV was four, V was five, X was ten … and they also had L, C and M as numbers.

All this suddenly stopped when the Emperor Claudius received a text saying – I LV CLAVDIVS – and he didn’t know whether it was an amorous message from his girl-friend or his wife’s new telephone number.

Einstein too was a great mathematician who devised Einstein’s Theory of Relativity without the use of a calculator. According to him, the richer you are the more relatives will attend your funeral.

Also, according to Einstein, if a tree falls in the forest and there is no one there to see it then it will remain upright.

He was once asked, is it true that sound does not travel in a vacuum, and if a man shouts in a vacuum then his screams will not be heard?

He replied “It depends whether the vacuum is switched on at the time and how much dust is in the dust bag.”

Which all reminds me of the skunk running through the forest as the wind suddenly turns direction. He stops and says “AAHH … it all comes back to me now!”

15 comments:

  1. IPSUM RIDICULAM. BENE GESTA
    BENEDICTIO, VICTOR

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I don't know Latin. So I asked my dog to translate. He growled and said CAVE CANEM !!!

      God bless you, Vicky.

      Delete
  2. Math has never been so fun! Thank you!!

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    Replies
    1. Hi Hand-Maid,

      Thanx for visiting us here and commenting. Glad you enjoyed our Maths lesson.

      God bless.

      Delete
  3. 'the richer you are the more relatives will attend your funeral.'

    A definite laugh riot, Vic. Here's another one...ahem

    Newton had a minor brain concussion when an apple fell from a tree and knocked him unconscious. Needless to say he woke up and and came up with the famous theory of gravity- if you don't have bread, lend them apples.

    Oh wait...I think that was Physics.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Great to see you visiting again Remedia. Thanx.

      I like your joke. Perhaps I should write a post about Physics next.

      God bless.

      Delete
    2. You are such a comedian Victor! I love the line about the skunk!

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    3. Hi Daily Grace,

      I wonder if the skunk ever realises what he smells like. Can you imagine? He'd be always running away from himself !!!

      God bless.

      Delete
  4. Victor, Here's a strange thing: I loved math, but I wasn't very good at it : 0
    Counting grains of sand in the desert sounds like an ancient form of torture!
    And the skunk ending is too funny.
    Blessings +

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Hi Caroline,

      When I was on the beach last summer I had more sand in my shoes and socks than the grains of sand on the beach itself. Sand has a habit of getting everywhere. It was even in the turn-ups of my trousers and under the lapels of my jacket. My pin-striped suit was ruined; I tell you! Plenty of sand but thankfully no skunks.

      God bless.

      Delete
  5. I wonder, Colleen. If a skunk gets a cold does he still smell bad?

    God bless.

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  6. I wish you were my math teacher when I was in school.

    I still might not have scored well, but at least I would have laughed.

    God Bless you.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Laughter is very important, of course. Even in Maths.

      Thank you Michael for your kind comment. God bless you.

      Delete

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