Wednesday, 4 November 2026

Uphill Young Life


Father Ignatius came out of the Sacristy and found a young boy at the back of the church crying. It was Tim Bryant.

The priest knew the eleven year old well. He came from a very poor family and had a difficult life despite his few years in this world.

Tim often worked hard after school to supplement the family budget. He delivered groceries for Mr Harris to all the customers in the vicinity. The priest had seen him often pushing his bicycle up the steep hill in Carrington Road and Heath Avenue. Those two roads were steep all right … but not as steep as Nelson Gardens right up the hill where Tim often delivered cans of food as well as vegetables and other items purchased from Mr Harris.

He certainly enjoyed the ride down the hill when the deliveries were finished and his bicycle was light; but going up was really difficult, especially when it was dark and cold in winter.

He’d been working for Mr Harris for about a year now and proudly gave his mother the £3 a week he earned to help her pay the rent and buy food.

She too worked hard. She took in washing from a number of people every week to earn a little more than what she got by cleaning people’s homes.

Some time ago Father Ignatius decided to help her without appearing to be charitable and risk losing her dignity. He decided that the Altar boys vestments needed washing and ironing at least once a month, as well as various other church items such as the Altar cloth and other items of linen. He asked Mrs Bryant to take on this task for a monthly fee, which she gladly did.

However, this upset Mrs Davenport, his housekeeper, who felt she was perfectly capable of doing this work as she had done for years … thank you very much!

The priest diplomatically explained that Mrs Davenport’s talents were in the kitchen and that her culinary expertise made many a professional chef green with envy. It would be wrong to waste such skills on washing vestments.

Mrs Davenport acquiesced and peace was restored once again in the Parish House.

Tim’s father, Mr Bryant, was partly the cause of much unhappiness in the poor household. He earned a pittance doing odd jobs as a gardener; but whatever he earned was soon spent on drink. He often got home in a bad state, got into an argument which he started, and then beat his wife and son.

Mrs Bryant often begged Father Ignatius not to say anything to anyone, least of all the Authorities for fear that her son Tim would be taken into care and she’d lose him for ever. The priest understood well this dilemma, yet could not let such a situation continue where mother and child are often beaten up, sometimes violently. He had spoken to Mr Bryant on many occasions, sometimes harshly threatening to report him to the police, yet Mr Bryant would be totally and fully repentant, promising not to lay a finger on his family ever again and to stop drinking forthwith … only to repeat his behavior in a few weeks later.

Understandably, young Tim performed very badly at school. When you work hard delivering groceries every night, and you go home not knowing whether your parents will be there, or whether you’d be beaten for no reason and often went to bed hungry because there is no food in the house, it is very difficult to concentrate on your studies.

And now there he was … the poor eleven year old crying at the back of the church.

Father Ignatius approached him and asked gently, “What’s the matter Tim? Has your dad beaten you?”

“No … it’s much worse.” said the boy wiping his eyes with the back of his hand.

What could be much worse, thought the priest. “Would you like to tell me about it?” he asked.

“You know I deliver groceries for Mr Harris?” said the young lad.

The priest nodded.

“Well … today as I was delivering in Wilson Lane someone stole from my bicycle when I left it there to go to one of the houses. They took a few vegetables and packets of sugar and flour.

“Mr Harris got very angry with me and said I stole them. He didn’t believe me when I told him what happened and he fired me.

“Mom will be very upset because she needs the money I give her every week. Dad will go mad … as always.”

“Is Mr Harris the greengrocer just by the corner at the end of the street?” asked the priest gently, not forgetting to say a silent prayer for the Lord to help in this situation.

“Yes!” said Tim.

“Well … I need some fresh air. Let’s walk there and see what the Lord Jesus will do to help us about this! Always trust in Jesus, Tim. He will help change a bad situation for the good, if you trust Him.”

As they arrived at the small shop Father Ignatius asked the boy to wait outside and went in alone.

“What can I do for you Padre?” said Mr Harris from behind the counter.

“We haven’t met,” said the priest, “I’ve come with that young boy outside. He used to work for you until today …”

“Oh … yes …” said Mr Harris looking through the shop window.

“I’ve known the boy for years … he’s not the type who would steal, Mr Harris. I tend to believe what he told you …”

Mr Harris raised his eyebrows.

“Are you the priest from the church up the hill?” he asked.

“Yes, how rude of me. I should have introduced myself. I’m Father Ignatius from St Vincent Church!”

“Yeh … I’ve heard about you …” continued Mr Harris, “you lot buy a good deal from me. Good customers you are.

“Your housekeeper, Mrs Davenport, is always here fussing about what she buys. ‘Must have the best vegetables for Father Ignatius’ she says … ‘These are not fresh enough … these are too big … these are too small …’ and on and on she goes. My wife calls her Mrs Fusspot … behind her back of course.”

“Oh!” said the priest who had no idea where his household purchases came from, “is she here often?”

“Yes … every week! She fills her trolley to the brim and pulls it behind her up the hill. It must be very difficult for a woman her age.”

“Why doesn’t she have everything delivered?” asked the priest.

“She’s too mean …” said Mr Harris, “I suggested the idea to her but she said that the church is short of cash and she will not waste good funds on delivery charges!”

“I tend to agree with you!” Father Ignatius went on, “it’s wrong for her to pull a heavy trolley up the hill every week. She should have everything delivered … if only you had a delivery boy!”

“I see where you’re coming from …” laughed Mr Harris, “perhaps I was wrong to accuse the lad of stealing. He’s a good boy and works hard. Bring him in and tell him he’s hired!”

And that’s how the Lord Jesus helped Tim Bryant get his job back delivering for Mr Harris.

Father Ignatius had a little difficulty explaining to Mrs Davenport why it was better to have everything delivered, but it wasn’t a task that his diplomacy couldn’t handle. Three months later Mr Bryant, Tim’s dad, died suddenly of a heart attack. The beatings stopped once and for all, and in time, Tim started to improve with his work at school. 

NOTE: If you liked this story, why not read other short stories or full novels featuring Father Ignatius by clicking HERE 

Monday, 2 November 2026

What's on my mind?

 

 
The other day my good friend Mevely mentioned on her Blog how she uses AI to make up various photos and selfies. I admitted I am not so good with technical things; but Mevely encouraged me to have a try at AI and share it on my Blog. 
 
Well ... I did. I told my techie what was on my mind at the time. The result is shown above.

Thursday, 29 October 2026

Poetry

  

 
 
ODE TO PAINFUL LOVE

Let not our love

Slip through our fingers

You bit my bum

And the pain still lingers

I screamed and I cried

Like the three tenor singers … … …



“You ain't nothin' but a hound dog

Biting all the time

You ain't nothin' but a hound dog

Biting all the time

Well, you bit my bum so hard and you ain't no friend of mine.”

 

Don’t worry if your job’s a joke
And your successes few;
Remember that the mighty oak
Was once a nut like you!
 
 

 When I was a little child
My mother said to me
There are two words my son
That'll open many doors for thee

PULL and PUSH

 

She stood on the bridge at midnight
Her heart was all a quiver
She gave a little cough
And her wig fell down the river 

 

Say it with flowers
And chocolates too
Say it with jewellery
Or a good meal for two
Say it from the heart
Say what you think
But never be careless
And say it with ink 
 
 
A certain young lady named Lilly
Likes knickers light pink and frilly.
In winter she wears
Maybe three or four pairs,
To keep her from feeling too chilly.
 
 
Rose's are red
Violet's are blue
Enid's are green
And Sophie's are pink with white dots

(I've seen them on the washing line)
 
Did I ever mention my other aunt Olive?
When she was born, the ink in the pen they used did not come out for a bit
so the writing on the birth certificate was not accurate.
 
Instead of Olive they named her Clive.
 
She always insisted on being obeyed to the letter.
Once she told me I could eat the left-over chicken in the fridge.
 
I did, and I was freezing being in the fridge! 
 
AND FINALLY
 
Does a constipated owl suffer from
Irritable Owl Syndrome?
 

 

Tuesday, 27 October 2026

A la menu


I had the misfortune to be in London to meet someone on business. I had never met her before. After our meeting was over I suggested we go to lunch. I was the host and I picked the first restaurant nearby. 

What a stupid mistake. It was one of those pretentious very posh and extremely expensive restaurants where you come out more hungry than when you went in.

As we sat down a condescending waiter in a suit approached our table and said, "Welcome madam et monsieur, may I explain our concept especially designed for your pleasure and enjoyment?"

I was totally confused. For a moment I thought we were at a house of ill-repute. "Concept? Pleasure? Enjoyment?" I thought. My concept is much simpler. We are here to eat and leave.

The waiter went on to explain how and where they source their products; which in English means buy their food. How it is prepared; which means cooked. And presented; which means served.

I looked at the menu he gave us. It had words like "Pissaladiere, Escargot de Bourgogne, Ratatouille, Haricot Verts Amandine," and other fancy words which although I understood in French I did not know what they meant. For instance. what is a Pissaladiere when it's at home? I know that escargot means snails but does it matter if they come from Bourgogne, wherever that is, as opposed to from my back garden? Ratatouille? Well, I never. And what is green beans Amandine?

It's amazing how these people misuse the English language to mean something completely different. One of the dishes had a "delicate Bechamel sauce"; meaning it was mostly water. Another included a "hint of aromatic herbs"; meaning the dust you find at the end of the packet when you've used all its content.  

I foolishly confessed that I don't like garlic. Is there anything on the menu without garlic? 

He cleared his throat and condescended, "Zeez eez a French restaurant monsieur. Garlic eez our specialitee!" 

Then came the sommelier who, just as patronisingly explained that some wines had a good palate and a sweet nose of "framboise" with a hint of autumn bouquet; Here's that word "hint" again. The wine waiter suggested that different vintages delicately supplement certain ingredients to maximise our eating experience and "pleasure". Sadly, they did not stock any brands of beers. 

As I studied the menu trying to appear knowledgeable I noticed that none of the items had any price next to them. Not even the wines.

Each item on the food menu had a number next to it. 2019, 2017, 2022 and so on. I asked the posh guy what the numbers meant and he said it is the dates which that particular dish was created by the chef.

What?

"Are they not passed their sell-by date?" I asked, "we don't want stale rotten food you know!"

He did not respond or even crack a smile.

I mean, how can you possibly create a ratatouille, or a snail, or whatever else is on the menu? A meal is a meal and you make it as it has always been made with minute variations.

And why should the client be interested that a certain dish was "created" at a certain date? Does it really matter?  

All in all, a disappointing experience with minute portions and extremely extremely over-priced.

We left just as hungry as we went in. Fortunately I had two KFC legs in my pocket from a previous meal. I offered her one but she declined pretending she was on a diet.    

I cleaned off the lint from my pocket and ate both portions.

Sunday, 25 October 2026

The Great Commandment

 


But when the Pharisees had heard that He had put the Sadducees to silence, they were gathered together. Then one of them, who was a lawyer, asked Him a question, tempting Him, and saying, Master, which is the great commandment in the law? Jesus said unto him, "You shall love the Lord your God with all your heart, and with all your soul, and with all your mind. This is the first and great commandment. And the second is like it, You shall love your neighbour as yourself. On these two commandments hang all the law and the prophets." (Matthew 22:34-40)

 
They'll know we are Christians by our love. 

Friday, 23 October 2026

Stop this silly craze

 

Many utilities and businesses are now going paperless to "save the planet". I don't understand this. Is the planet made of paper? 

These businesses send invoices and communications by e-mail in order to go totally paperless. Now we get empty envelopes instead. How am I to know who sent the envelope so that I can reply? 

I have complained to said utilities and businesses by sending them empty envelopes back. Not one has replied. And it is difficult following a paper trail.

This paperless craze has caught on with Internet shops too. I ordered some printing paper for my printer on-line and they sent me empty packages and boxes.  

Our supermarkets no longer sell toilet paper. You can buy an empty inner roll but not all the paper that surrounds it. Instead, they sell small packets of perforations and they advise you to use them instead.

The home improvements shops no longer sell wallpaper and suggest you use paint. 

Stationers don't stock writing paper, notepads, or birthday and other cards. But they have empty envelopes for you to send instead. No wrapping paper for gifts either. 

Paper bags for shopping are being stopped as well as anything else made of paper like paper napkins, handkerchiefs, and even newspapers. Our newsagent has closed down and the tobacconist now sells the tobacco loose instead of cigarettes. 

Can you imagine a paperless world? No more books and no more libraries. All books will be electronically made and sold. No more instruction manuals on how to use your new oven, fridge, car or whatever. No more music sheets for musicians in an orchestra. No more menus at a restaurant. No more paper confetti to throw at married couples and at parades. Everything will be electronically made and used.

I'm off to the bathroom with a packet of perforations and an electronic tablet!   

How about you? Have you gone paperless yet?

Wednesday, 21 October 2026

The set-backs of modern technology

 

I have been given as a gift one of these new electronic contraptions. It is the size of a cell-phone, flat, about two inches by four. You fit it in your pocket and you can listen to books being read to you whilst you're walking, or on the bus, or whatever.

I am presently reading through my ears Samuel Johnson's "History of Rasselas, Prince of Abyssinia". Very gripping. Having just finished listening to James Joyce's "Portrait of the artist as a young man"; and "On ne badine pas avec l'amour" by Alfred de Musset.

The contraption comprises of a white lead which you insert into the machine at one end, and the other end it has two ear-pieces which act as mini speakers when you put them in your ears to listen.

I normally put the machine in my jacket pocket and all one can see is the lead to my ears as I walk happily in the park or wherever I choose to walk.

I also like to listen to books being read to me when swimming at the local municipal baths. Especially books about swimming styles. I originally learnt to swim by reading a book, but all the pages got wet. Pity this new contraption had not been invented back then.

Anyway, the two ear-pieces you put in your ears have been water-proofed. They are OK to be used whilst you are in the water. But unfortunately the contraption itself is not water-proof. I cannot insert it into my swimming trunk pants and jump in the water happily. I was warned about that.

I tried leaving the contraption at the side of the pool, but I could not swim very far because the white lead connecting it to my ears was too short.

A friend of mine bought me a new white lead six metres long, so I could leave the contraption on the side of the pool and swim happily to the story of Captain Ahab and the white whale by Herman Melville. Unfortunately, the lead got in the way of the other swimmers who complained that I was restricting their enjoyment of the municipal bath which, as the name implies, is meant to be a public place and not one for the sole use of myself.

So I now only use the contraption whilst walking, or on the bus, or when watching something boring on TV, or my wife is speaking.

Modern technology is good. But not that good.

Saturday, 17 October 2026

Give to God that which is God’s

 

May I direct you to a sermon by Father Jonathan E Moore describing the history and characters at the time of Jesus. Please CLICK HERE.

Friday, 16 October 2026