Monday 11 January 2016

Lost Property

ASSISTANT: Can I help you Sir?

ME: Yes please. I wonder if anyone has handed in a glove at Lost Property. We were in this store about an hour ago and my son has lost a glove.

ASSISTANT: A glove, you say? No … no gloves handed in. But you can have a pencil instead.

ME: A pencil?

ASS: That’s right. You can choose any colour. Does your son like a blue one? Red perhaps?

ME: No thanks. We came in for a lost glove.

ASS: But, we have plenty of pencils. No one ever hands in a glove to Lost Property it is always pencils, or pens, or rulers or envelopes.

ME: No wonder people hand in pencils and pens. This is a stationery store after all!

ASS: Yes it is a stationery store … but we’re moving tomorrow. Just next door. It’s just to confuse the customers. We’ve been here as a stationery store for two years now. So we decided to move next door. It’s like they do in supermarkets. They move things around every so often to confuse the customers. You go in looking for soap in the usual place and instead they have put tins of beans there. The soap is where something else used to be. It’s to get customers to walk around the store and buy something else; like dog food, even though you do not have a dog. It’s called Retail Planning Layout. So we’re doing the same and moving next door.

ME: I understand. I only came in to check if someone had handed in a glove.

ASS: And one more thing. Did you know that no matter how much you push the envelope it still remains stationery? Unlike us. We're moving tomorrow.

(Voice from behind me): Dad, I have found it. It was in my pocket all the time.

ASS: Ah … I see your son has a glove. We do not encourage pickpockets or shoplifting in this store.

ME: But … it’s his own glove. He had it all the time.  

ASS: So you say. He most probably picked it up without paying.

ME: But it’s the same as his other glove. Look!

ASS: So you admit he has stolen two gloves? I must insist you see the manager or I’ll press this panic button down here. I don’t know what it’ll do; but I’ve always wanted to find out.

ME: I assure you, my son has not stolen any gloves. You can see they are worn out. Besides, this is a stationery store. You don’t even sell gloves.

ASS: I told you we are moving tomorrow so we're not that stationery are we? Besides, he could have stolen the gloves from another shop. How do you explain they were in his pocket?

ME: If he stole them from another shop; which he didn’t, it would hardly be any business of yours. Would it?

ASS: You’ve got a point there. And so has this pencil. Would you like a pencil? It’s got a point too. A pencil without a point would be pointless. But all our pencils have points; in many colours too. Blue, red, green, yellow, mauve … now that’s an interesting colour … mauve … rhymes with move, which we are doing tomorrow.


Life is complicated. More so than it was a generation or two ago.

Everyone thinks he has a point of view, no matter how badly thought-out, or perhaps not thought-out at all, is that point of view; or perhaps just borrowed from someone else so as to make it totally pointless.

Consequently, many people push their point of view forward at every opportunity regardless whether it is a good point of view or totally pointless.

And a pointless point of view is not worth the brain cells it is written on.


  1. Life's crazy, isn't it, Victor. And there are so many lessons to be learned along the way. Thank you for sharing yours here.

    Always with grace ... and a sense of humor, too!

    1. That's true Linda. So often I meet people who have their opinion, and no one else's matters or is right.

      God bless you. Thank you for visiting me.

  2. I would give you a piece of my mind--but there would be no point in it-Victor!

  3. You make a fine point.
    Have a blessed day. ~:)

  4. Hi Victor,

    Life is truly complicated isn't it? So are people points of view, especially when they pointless. Pointy point of views on the other hand....


    1. It's good to see you visiting here again, Jose. How are you? Thanx for your comment.

      God bless you.

    2. Everything is good! Newlywed, getting adjusted to married life. I hope all is well with you!

    3. CONGRATULATIONS Jose. Best wishes for a long and happy married life.

      God bless you both.

  5. So true! I know I get mixed up too, of which point is mine and which point is another's. And a loose one glove a lot! Tough to remember what is mine sometimes, and then not to loose it.

    1. Thank you Lynn for your visit. Much appreciated.

      In a confusing world as this is; we often find that our views are influenced by others and by news media and it becomes unclear as to what we really think.

      God bless you Lynn.

  6. The abbreviation "ASS" was perfectly suited. LOL.

    1. The problem is Manny, in life, there are plenty self-opinianated ASSistants like this one.

      God bless.



God bless you.