Thursday 29 June 2017

Look at me - I'm famous now!



Someone once said, "In the future, everyone will be world-famous for 15 minutes." It was either Andy Warhol or me. I can't remember who.

Anyway, it seems to me that these days everyone wants to be an instant celebrity; even though they have no talent whatsoever, no actual knowledge or experience of anything useful to mankind, and nothing in particular to boast about apart from sharing an IQ score of 1 with a dead rat.

If someone has a great singing voice, or can play a musical instrument very well, or can act superbly, or is great at sports etc ... Then that individual is a star. He or she is an individual recognised for his or her talent. There's nothing wrong with that. Equally, if someone is a renowned scientist, doctor, engineer or whatever else profession; then again they deserve their place in peoples' admiration and respect.

However, the no-talent fame of which I speak are those individuals, hitherto unknown to society, and even to themselves, who somehow appear on some reality show, or do something inane to gain them their "15 minutes" in the limelight, who suddenly become celebrities and they are regaled and applauded by one and all.

Suddenly, these previously unknown individuals are all over my TV screen, my radio, and it seems, every newspaper, magazine and online media that exists. They appear on talk-shows as special guests, they are reported on in the news media and suddenly they gain importance far beyond what they deserve.

What is more of concern, is that they become opinion formers, and role models to those sections of society who cannot think for themselves. They appear on political programs and pronounce their views which, I guess, are applauded more because of who said them rather than for the soundness of what has been said.

I suspect some of you reading this think that I am envious and jealous of these talentless celebrities. Well, let me tell you, my friends, of course I am. Where is Andy Warhol when you need him? Why can't I have my 15 minutes or more of fame and adulation? As it is, even my dog ignores me. When I point to his bed and say, "Chalky, go to bed!" he looks at my finger as if to say, "Who's Fred?"

When I walk the streets no one recognises me or asks for my autograph. The other day someone stopped me in the supermarket and said, "Hello. Long time no see! I thought you were dead! Was it you or your cousin who died last year?"

I replied, "It must have been me, because I spoke to my cousin only this morning!"

He said, "Tell him I said 'Hi!' and walked off to pay for his shopping.

And then, to add insult to injury, I was talking to a chap at church only this morning and he said that he'd seen my website and did not realise that I wrote books. I said that I did, and as I had a copy of "VISIONS" in the car, I got it out and gave it to him. Then I jokingly added, "Do you want me to autograph it?"

He replied, "No, I don't want you to damage it. I'll give it to someone I know for his birthday!"

What a humiliation. Not only will he not read my book; but he'll give it away and pretend he bought someone a birthday present.

What more can I do to be famous?

9 comments:

  1. Laughing, My Friend! NOT TO WORRY--you have quite a fan club here in Louisiana!
    Blessings!

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    1. That's great, Lulu. I wish I could visit you in Louisiana or Texas. Give my fans a big hug.

      God bless y'all.

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  2. 'How to be more famous:' a question which has baffled philosophers throughout the ages.

    I might suggest setting fire to one's hair, but that would hurt. Standing on a table and screaming like a chicken would probably insult chickens, and one does not want to arouse their wrath.

    Earning fame? No, that can't be it. There's too much effort involved. There must be an easier solution. Or maybe not. ;)

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    1. Actually Brian, I did try the chicken suggestion and they won't let me in at KFC anymore. Well, at least I am famous in one restaurant.

      God bless you my friend.

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  3. LOL!!! Victor, you deserve way more than just 15 minutes of fame. I almost died reading this as I was laughing so hard. I am thankful for your humor which happens to be a ray of sunshine on this dreadfully rainy day. God bless you, my friend! :-)

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    1. It's great to see you visiting here again Tai. Thank you. And I'm glad I made you laugh. Please invite your friends to come over for a laugh too.

      God bless you and yours.

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  4. You are most welcome, Victor! Laughter is the best medicine, so I’m always blessed when I visit with you. GOD bless you and yours as well! 🙂

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