Friday 17 September 2021

Doctor Check-Up

 

I took this old gentleman to the doctor for his regular check-up. Nothing serious. Just a check-up. He lives in a Senior Citizens Home, and despite his age he is as sharp as a button. Great brain and intellect.

When we got there, as usual, he asked me to stay with him for the doctor's consultation. This time it was not the usual doctor. A new one aged about forty or so.

He introduced himself as the new doctor and said, "You know ... as we get older, we all have lapses in memory. We tend to forget things. Does this happen to you often?"

The old man replied promptly, "No ... never ... I don't have a problem with my memory. In fact I can tell you who is our Prime Minister. It is either Churchill ... or that other fellow ... Presley, I think ... yes ... probably Elvis Presley. We had an election recently you know!"

I was about to intervene when the old man glanced at me sideways as if to say, "Keep out of it!"

I said nothing.

The doctor mumbled, "I see ... the Prime Minister is either Winston Churchill or Elvis Presley!"

At which the old man said, "Have the visitors been yet?"

I thought the man was losing his marbles. A few sandwiches short of a picnic. Why was he behaving like that?

The doctor asked, "Visitors?"

To which the old man continued, "Yes ... we get visitors in the afternoon after lunch. Have we had lunch? Because I'm still hungry!"

The doctor wrote a few notes in his book and then asked, "Tell me ... imagine we had a bath here full of water; and I asked you to empty it using a spoon or a cup. Which would you use?"

The old man thought a little and asked, "Which carries more water?"

The doctor said, "the cup of course!"

"Funny that," said the old man, "I would just pull the plug and see all the water drain through the plug hole ... more efficient that way!"

The doctor was about to say something. The old man raised his hand and said, "One moment Doctor. My friend here has something to tell you!"

I explained that the old man was as sane as anyone else. The only reason he is in an old peoples' home is because he has some physical difficulty. In fact he used to be a doctor and is well aware of all these cognitive tests.

The rest on the consultation went all right.

28 comments:

  1. ...is being as sharp as a button the same as being as sharp as a tack?

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    1. I am sorry, Tom. The expression should have been "as bright as a button" meaning: intelligently alert and lively. I got it wrong in my post.

      God bless.

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    2. ...and here I've always thought that you were as bright as a button. Perhaps you have become a bit tarnished.

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  2. Here the doc gives you 3 words to remember and asks what they were at the end of the consultation. I do not hear another word he says the entire time, because I am repeating those 3 words over and over to myself. Don't you think that shows some initiative, Victor?
    Blessings!

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    1. What three words? I forgot already. What day is it? Are we in February yet? Because my aunt's birthday is in June! She likes fish you know.

      God bless, Lulu.

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  3. LOL! From one doctor to another . . .
    Blessings, Victor!

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  4. Good for him! Reminds me of that old quote, 'Old age and treachery will always beat youth and exuberance.'

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    1. He is very bright and lively. Wonderful man. He enjoyed playing a joke on the new doctor.

      God bless you, Mevely.

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  5. I am just assuming the roles are backwards and you were taken to the DR? Or ........ Maybe it is possible to be sharp when you get old, at least I sure hope so. LOL

    Always enjoy the visit here.
    Sherry & jack (always one sandwich short of a picnic and sharp as a hammer!)

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    1. No ... honest Jack ... It is I who took him to the doctor's. I went to the doctor last week to have my sense of humour checked!

      Take care my friends and keep smiling. God bless you both, Jack and Sherry.

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  6. I love love this story. Why do people assume that just because one grows old in years does not mean that we are also senile? I adore my daughter and one of the reasons is that she never makes me feel old. Thanks for a heartwarming story today, Victor. God bless

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    1. I am so glad you liked this post, Nells. We are never old if we like a laugh.

      God bless you and your family.

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  7. Dearest Victor,
    Oh, those stupid cognitive tests are annoying! The three words is one and I had to walk in the room and touch the wall at the doctor's command after turning around. He only said I was 'very fast' and never had to do that test... WHY?
    Nice that you took this former doctor for his check up!
    Hugs,
    Mariette

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    1. I guess the doctors mean well with all these tests. But you are right, they make people feel inadequate and senile.

      God bless you always, Mariette.

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  8. I would like to hang out with your friend the doctor.

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  9. I knew he was just playing tricks with the doctor. Sometimes you need to appear incompetent to be able to stay in the place where you can have help when you need it.

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    1. You cannot fool some elderly people.

      God bless, River.

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  10. Gotta be careful what you tell the doctor! What you say can and will be used against ... oh, wait a minute, that's the police. Never mind.

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    1. That's true, Mimi. Doctors keep notes of all we say.

      God bless.

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