Monday 13 September 2021

The Lion

 

I was walking in the park and I saw a lion. He ran in front of me. From the left to the right. Got out of one bush and ran right across into another.

I had to inform somebody. I ran to the nearest public phone box and searched the telephone directory. I could not find the Missing Lions Bureau; in case someone had lost a lion. I phoned the first official looking phone number.

Within minutes a car drew up and out came two men in uniform. One was tall and thin, the other one short and rotund. I could not tell who was who because they kept moving around.

They did not believe my story. They said I saw a big dog. I assured them it was a lion. I can tell the difference between a lion and a dog - it is spelt differently.  

They took no chances. They alerted someone else. Within minutes they sealed off the area and started searching the park; assuming the lion was still there and had not moved to a nearby fast food outlet or restaurant for a meal.

There were men in different uniforms everywhere. Some were carrying big butterfly nets. Others were on horses with lassos. Others had tranquilliser darts and other lion capturing instruments. A man was selling mouse traps. The mice were so scared they threw themselves on the traps.

There were helicopters flying overhead searching in case the lion took to the air. They had road blocks everywhere and they searched all cars in and out of town. Also all ports and airports. People were asked to empty their pockets to ensure they were not hiding a fugitive lion.

Vans with loudspeakers warned everyone if they see a lion not to approach it in case it is dangerous. They advised people to go indoors, or hide behind a tree, and phone the authorities.

They contacted all zoos to check if any lions were missing. The nearest zoo to us is 50 miles away. The zoos started a lions head-count. They counted lions, as well as tigers, pumas, cheetahs, panthers, lynxes, gerbils, guinea pigs, hamsters and any other creatures likely to be mistaken for a lion. None were missing. However, they discovered that a zoo attendant was having an affair with a waitress in a cupboard in the store-room!

With all this commotion around town, I went to church and started praying about the lion and hoping it would harm no one.

That is when I heard a voice. Very clear in my head. 

It said, "Do not worry my son. I have often mistaken that dog for a lion, Myself!"


25 comments:

  1. Dearest Victor,
    Haha, what a story and you certainly would not have stayed there with a lion in front of you...
    Big dog will be more likely.
    On Saturday morning when I biked to the store, a BIG DOG came running after me... Haha, hate that as I don't want a chunk of meat being torn out of my leg. Its owner was frantically yelling (calling him/her?) but it seemed there was something with its hearing ability!
    Glad I escaped it...
    Hugs,
    Mariette

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. So fortunate the dog did not harm you Mariette. Dogs should not be left loose by owners - so dangerous.
      Glad you're well.

      God bless.

      Delete
  2. ...finding the Missing Lions Bureau can be tricky.

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    Replies
    1. I looked under Missing ... then Lions ... and then Bureau. They should have better Index in telephone directories.

      God bless, Tom.

      Delete
  3. Much ado about nothing!
    Blessings, Victor!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. It could have been a lion, Lulu. Then it would be much ado about a lion!

      God bless you.

      Delete
  4. Replies
    1. He was big, and brown, and bigger still!!!

      God bless, Sandi.

      Delete
  5. Quote: "Do not worry my son. I have often mistaken that dog for a lion, Myself!"

    IT IS GOOD TO KNOW YOU ARE NOT ALONE!
    My first thought was, and this started from one phone call, WOW!
    Love from over here thanks for the entertainment with some logic included.
    Sherry & jack on the other side.

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    Replies
    1. I thought I was doing everyone a favour, warning them about a lion on the loose.

      So glad you enjoyed this post, Jack and Sherry.

      God bless.

      Delete
  6. What a lovely and entertaining way to start the week. Funny and uplifting as always, Victor. Hope you have an extraordinary week. Blessings, my friend.

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    Replies
    1. Thank you so much for your kindness, Nells. I hope you are keeping well.

      God bless always.

      Delete
  7. You sure caused some commotion, Victor, with your lion sighting. Thanks for the funnies today!
    Blessings!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. He looked like a lion ... a barking lion.

      God bless, Martha.

      Delete
  8. Well, darn. I was hoping to hear about the cowboy lassoing the lion. 😉

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    Replies
    1. Yes, me too. I wanted to see how they could capture him with a lasso.

      God bless, Mevely.

      Delete
  9. The mice need not of worried. Aren't lions afraid of mice? :)

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    Replies
    1. Probably they are afraid of mice ... but do the mice know that?

      God bless, Happyone.

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  10. You sure stirred up the zoo. I bet there are some gossips busy with them. And mice? Elephants are afraid of mice.

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    Replies
    1. I'm sure there's a lot of gossip about the attendant and the waitress, Susan. And about elephants and mice too.

      God bless.

      Delete
  11. The dog owner needs to make sure to lock it up, otherwise someone will get hurt trying to get away from what s/he thinks is a lion.

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  12. I feel sorry for all those people called out to catch a non-existant lion.

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    Replies
    1. Yeh ... I feel sorry for some of those people too.

      God bless, River.

      Delete

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