Thursday, 23 May 2019

More Scientific Facts


We all have DNA in us. Apparently it is a spring like thing that goes round and round like a slide and helps us bounce when we are healthy and happy.

In Australia people have their DNA go round in the opposite direction to people in the Northern hemisphere. Also, over there it is spelled AND.

Laughter is part of our DNA or AND. Laughter is a build up of pressure deep within us somewhere near the stomach. Then it goes up the asparagus and comes out as a loud noise from a hole in our head. From anywhere else and you're in deep trouble.

This is a little well un-known fact which you did not know. This is why it is an un-known fact. Here are other un-known facts which you should know so that they may become known facts.

For example; did you know that the majority of men with beards (about 68%) sleep with their beards tucked under the bed covers rather than over the bed covers?

And that beards grow faster and longer than hair on men's heads?

Did you know that you should not sleep with your head under the pillow otherwise the tooth fairy will take all your teeth away?

Human ears grow bigger in proportion to the rest of our bodies as we grow older? I knew an old man once with very large ears sticking out quite a bit. He looked like a car with its doors open. When he was outdoors, at the slightest gust of wind he would pirouette round like a hotel revolving door.

Did you know that if you had a meal in a restaurant that is totally dark you would not be able to tell the difference between steak and a beefburger?

Did you also know that if you're in a vacuum and you shout loud no one would hear you? And it would make no difference whether the vacuum cleaner is switched on or off, or whether the bag is full of dirt and dust or whether it is empty?

Do you realise that if you had a small bird in a cage, and as you happen to weigh the cage, if the bird jumped up from its perch then its weight would not register on the scale? Also, if you were to weigh the cage under water the small bird would drown?

Did you know that crickets chirp less at night as it gets colder? In a warm night they would chirp about twenty times a minute. In a slightly colder night they would probably chirp ten or less times a minute. Whereas in cold temperatures they do not chirp at all because they are frozen out of their tiny minds.

Do you realise that there are viruses everywhere and they spread diseases; for example when we sneeze or even when we shake hands. Scientists recommend that we wash our hands before we shake hands with someone and also after we shake hands with them. This way we do not pass on our viruses or even get viruses from them. It is suggested you carry small disinfectant sprays or paper handkerchiefs for this purpose.

Did you know that most viruses are spread from people who go to the bathroom and do not wash their hands afterwards. You go to the bathroom and wash your hands, then you touch the door handle to get out and ... hey presto ... you have the viruses from the previous person who did not bother to wash his hands.

In fact, there are more viruses on door handles ... any door handles ... than there are on peoples' hands.

It is recommended that people no longer shake hands but shake door handles. Ideally, everyone should carry a door handle in their pocket and when they meet someone new they take out their door handle and gently shake it with the other person's door handle. That way no viruses would get on your or their hands.

This advice is sponsored by a well known local door handle manufacturer.

So there you have it. Tuck your beard under the bed covers, carry a door handle in your vacuum cleaner and mind your own DNA.

20 comments:

  1. Your forgot about the menus is restaurants. Filthy!! You order your food, the waitress takes away the menu and then you get the bread to much on... everyone who touched that menu is now in your stomach!! Science... not always accurate, though. Your findings are quite interesting!! LOL

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    Replies
    1. Yes, you are right, Terri. Some fast food restaurants also allow you to pre-order your food on a screen by touching it; then you go and collect your order. There was a report recently that those monitors were covered in germs. But you did not have to pay for them if you got them.

      God bless.

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  2. You have outdone yourself Victor!
    This was hilarious!!!
    So Funny that I re-read it twice :) :)

    Thank You!!!
    God Bless Your Funny Bone~

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I'm so glad I made you laugh, Jan. Send your friends over to this blog so they can laugh too. Check out my latest book just published - Laugh N Pray - on the right.

      God bless.

      Delete
  3. You always amaze me with the interesting facts you bring up.
    Funny stuff keeps the face smiling. ;)

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I do a lot of research for the benefit of my readers and to keep them smiling.

      God bless you, Bill.

      Delete
  4. Now that is a lot of facts (and funnies) to take in …
    Thank you.

    All the best Jan

    ReplyDelete
  5. I laughed out loud throughout this reading! Thanks! It reminded me of something my mother said when I was about 8 yrs. old. I'd been outside playing, and I slipped and fell in some dog poop. I was so angry and disgusted and ran home in a panic. When she saw me and saw the disgust & fear on my face; she said: "You'll be O.K.; you'd have to EAT a whole PECK of dirt before you died from it." I didn't know how big a 'peck' was ... but, it sounded like more than the amount of dog poop I had all over me ... and I had NOT 'eaten' ANY of it!!

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    Replies
    1. Thank you for your lovely story, Suzanne. Please visit us again soon for more humourous tales we can share together. Invite your friends too.

      God bless.

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  6. I LOVE this. All the same, I feel a little sad for the 'good old days' when people shook hands without reservation and worried less about contamination.

    ReplyDelete
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    1. AAAAAH ... In the good old days we had carbolic soap. We had education. People knew they had to wash their hands after going to the bathroom and before meals. In the good old days people were different. Now ... ... ...

      God bless you, Mevely.

      Delete
  7. Thanks for taking the time to educate us.

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    Replies
    1. It's a pleasure, Kathy. And it is all true as well.

      God bless you.

      Delete

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