What's all this about going out for a walk? What is the point, I tell you. Why not act civilised and stay at home and do something sensible. Like watching football on TV.
Ideally, I like to sit at the piano, with a glass of wine on the side, and perhaps a cigar or a pipe, and play some long forgotten tune from the past. Now that's romantic. And better than going out for another walk with the dog.
The problem with that scenario is that I don't smoke, and I don't drink wine, and I can't play the piano either. We don't even have a piano. We have a toy xylophone. It's out of tune since I accidentally stepped on it. We only bought it because it is in the book of alphabets under X. It was either buying a xylophone, or an X Ray machine.
By the way, it reminds me when I went to hospital for a check-up. They asked me to take all my clothes off and stand in front of this X Ray machine which took a photo from head to toe. Funny, I don't remember eating all those bones!
Anyway, I hate it when they say let's go for a walk.
Oh ... just there and back?
Well, I've just been there and back and beat you to it. Now leave me alone to watch the football.
But you'll get some fresh air.
I can always turn the fan on for that.
And you'll get some exercise. You need exercise.
I get all the exercise I need my pressing the buttons on the remote control.
At last, they went for a walk and left me in peace to watch the football. I got interrupted by a text message from a lady friend of mine.
I hate this new text speak, don't you? Shortened words like OMG, BTW and LOL. I thought LOL meant lots of love!
I texted her back, "Sorry to hear your mom has died. LOL"
She thinks I'm a heartless **** My family think I'm an idiot. And Heaven knows what you think.
Right now, I'll sit back and watch this video again and again ... that will be my exercise for the day.