The first hits of the ball went well and they talked to each other in golf lingo whilst I walked behind like a lap dog.
At one point we found two women up front by the next hole playing slowly. Apparently, there's a system in golf where you ask the slow players up front to move aside for a while; you play your turn at hitting the ball with a stick, then when you overtake them they continue with their slow game.
My business contact volunteered to go ahead and ask them to move. We stayed put as he walked some hundred yards or so, stopped and came back. "I'm sorry," he said his voice shaking, "I can't approach them. One of them is my wife and the other is my mistress!"
"Don't worry old boy," said the stranger we'd never met before, "I'll do it!"
He walked a hundred yards or so, stopped and came back angrily, "What the hell ..." he growled, "one of them is my wife and the other is my mistress!"
I expected a fight between the two of them. But in golf you're always a gentleman, or a lady. They decided to continue the game and asked me to go ahead and move the two women along.
I walked away a hundred yards and then stopped suddenly. One of the women was the headmistress at our school and the other was my boss's secretary.
We went to the club house for a quick drink and drove away swiftly. I never got that contract.
I hate golf.
...golf is a wonderful activity for rich people who have too much time on their hands.
ReplyDeleteInstead of having 18 small holes all over the place, why not have just one big hole for people to throw their balls into?
DeleteGod bless, Tom.
Oh, I loved the irony of this story, Victor! Never thought that golf could cause such problems.
ReplyDeleteBlessings!
Golf is such a silly game. Instead of taking a ball for a walk by hitting it with a stick, why not take a dog for a walk, or a donkey, a camel, llama or duck? A pigeon even. Or as a last resort, why not take one's spouse for a walk. Why an inanimate ball you have to hit with a stick?
DeleteGod bless, Martha.
LOL, good story. Golf is a great game, an equalizer if you will. There are lady's tee's, senior tee's etc. So even if you play with someone better than you, you can start from a different place. Golf courses are pretty and green, and except in winter are well landscaped with gorgeous flowers. Hubby enjoys it immensely. I've only played put put or mini golf which is fun. But, through golf is how we have a whole set of winter friends when we all meet up yearly in SC. There's a weekly golf scramble and so the golfers get to know each other, then a fun wine and cheese social where those of that don't play also can meet up. We have quite a group now, with couples from Penn, Ohio, Michigan, a few from Canada, and Iowa. Have an awesome week Victor, even if you're only carrying sticks for someone else.
ReplyDeleteI'll be honest with you Sandy. I only played/tried golf once. I was with other people. We started hitting the ball from a distance of 100 yards or so. I hit first and got a hole in one. I was totally surprised and thought it was a trick ball remotely controlled. The others were surprised too. The rest of the game was awful. I kept missing the ball altogether. I raised my arm and hit the man behind me with the stick by mistake ... what a disaster. Never played again.
DeleteI'm so glad you enjoy your golfing games and friends. I don't understand all the terms like birdie. eagle, albatross ... are these the birds you hit with a flying ball?
God bless, Sandy.
I was never a good tennis player or golfer. Baseball and basketball are still my favorites. But we go to Top Golf and I have honed my skill there. hahaha I will never be a great golfer but it is fun phamily time! I worked with a guy oce who broken someones car window and left his ins info and phone number. His entire phamily were police officers so he wanted to be honest. I dont think so many others are. I have been absent from blogging and reading the posts and comments I have missed it grreatly. I have been studying in the book of Timothy 1 & 2 and John and 1John 2:3. It is good to see you here with your humor still intact. I am happy I stopped by. Enjoy your weekend.
ReplyDeleteIt's nice to see you visiting here again "Tata". I hope you are keeping well.
DeleteI've never been good at any sports either. Not just golf. I just could not see the point of it all.
God bless always.
It's a small, small world!
ReplyDeleteI, too, have little use for the game.
Yes ... never play golf with strangers. Tennis is OK though.
DeleteKeep smiling and God bless, Mevely.
We tried golf when we were in Scotland. Ken did it for a while but was never very good.
ReplyDeleteI have a story of my mom and I playing golf in Scotland with Ken that I'll have to post about one day. :)
We look forward to your story, Happyone.
DeleteGod bless.