Friday 16 July 2021

Pipe On

 

I was thinking the other day. It was a Tuesday as I recall. You don't often see people smoking a pipe these days. Pity.

There was a time when many people used to smoke a pipe. It was quite a task cleaning the pipe with those wire type brushes and penknife thing. Then you take some tobacco from a small bag or pouch and put it in the pipe. Lighting it was a joy to see. Puffing away like a steam locomotive and filling the room with smoke as everyone has tears in their eyes and difficulty breathing. 

Some people used to have a pipe in their mouth but never light it. It was there as an ornament more than anything else.

Pipes make a person look distinguished. Learned. Pensive and serious. Like a professor, or a private detective from times gone by, sucking away at the pipe and solving complicated scientific problems or dastardly crimes.

When you smoke a pipe you need to have the vocabulary for it. In England you would say things like "By Jove" or "Don't you know!" and "Old boy!" You need to have the mannerisms too. When someone asks you something you don't answer straight-away. You stop and think for an hour or so, you puff at your pipe, and then say something.

Pipes are good as a prop. Like a walking-stick or a monocle. You could be walking in the street and someone asks you for directions. You take out the pipe from your mouth and point left and right like an index finger, "go straight ahead ... then turn left ... and then right!" You must be careful though you don't hit the other person in the eye with your pipe. Best practice in front of a mirror at home. Your wife may think you're an idiot but what does she know about style?

Pipes can be used as a greeting when you meet and recognise someone. You walk down the street, probably the same street as the one mentioned before. You meet someone you know. You take the pipe out your mouth, raise your hand in the air, and say, "Hello Frosdyke! How are you old boy?"

A bit like lifting your hat. Best do one or the other. Don't raise your hat and your pipe. It also helps if the other person has an unusual name like Frosdyke, Rowbottom, Marchmant or something like that. It doesn't work with just Fred Jones. So ignore him if you meet him and look the other way.

I think I'll take up pipe smoking. I need to practice first. When we were young you could buy little licorice pipes with a few red sweets at the end to simulate fire. They tasted nice too. I wonder if they still make them.

You can't find any good licorice these days. They all taste of tarmac. Probably made of tarmac I shouldn't wonder. Not that I've ever tasted tarmac. 

I asked a friend to buy me a pipe. He got me a ten-foot long drain-pipe. My wife thinks he's just as much an idiot as I am. 

26 comments:

  1. ...my father smoked a pipe and like many other pipe smokers he spent more time cleaning it than smoking it.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. It's the cleaning that makes you look learned and an expert. It gives you thinking time when people ask you something.

      God bless, Tom.

      Delete
  2. I never smoked a pipe on a regular basis, but for smoking of all types, the pipe smoke gives off the best aroma. Well maybe not the drain pipe!
    Have a great day........ if it is not too late.
    From this side,
    Sherry & jack

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Yes, there's that too. Pipe smoke did smell nice compared to cigarettes. I liked the smell and "taste" of the licorice pipes too.

      God bless, Jack and Sherry. Good day to you both.

      Delete
  3. PS: but it is the 'pointing' I remember most about pipe smokers. ;-) YOu described it well!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. People did not like it when I pointed with a licorice pipe. I thought it was sweet!

      God bless you both.

      Delete
  4. One of the first things that attracted me to Tom was his pipe! And yes, once I followed a stranger around the grocery because his pipe's aroma was so nice.
    I don't recall those licorice pipes, but 'smoked' my share on candy cigarettes!

    ReplyDelete
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    1. There you are - Tom is learned and wise and distinguished.

      I have found the licorice pipes on AMAZON UK. Here they are (currently not available) in the US:
      https://www.amazon.com/Pipette-Individually-Black-Licorice-BlackTie/dp/B00E67IOSS/ref=sr_1_4?crid=2DD4BB54US68K&dchild=1&keywords=licorice+pipes+black&qid=1626443795&sprefix=licorice+pipe%2Caps%2C223&sr=8-4

      I'll order some from AMAZON UK and use them to point people in the right direction.

      God bless, Mevely.

      Delete
  5. My grandfather smoked a pipe occasionally, Victor, and I can still picture him cleaning it and puffing on it. Seems pipes have gone out of fashion in these politically correct times.
    Blessings!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Political correctness seems to be spoiling this world. They worry about global warming, the environment and such things but they don't realise they are making themselves and everyone else miserable!

      I believe people in olden days were much happier despite their hard lives. I remember the adverts on TV for pipe tobacco. They claimed it had a great aroma - which it did! Now, (over here), all adverts for tobacco, cigarettes, and such are banned. TV Adverts for sweets, chocolates and certain fast foods should be shown after 9:00pm so as not to influence young people. Instead, we have adverts for gambling all through the day. Political correctness with blinkers on.

      Sorry for the rant, Martha. I need a whisky and a Guinness. I wish I had a pipe. Even a licorice one. Just ordered some from AMAZON. See my comment to Mevely.

      God bless.

      Delete
  6. Dearest Victor,
    A nice and nostalgic post and my Pieter certainly has filled many a pipe! He quit smoking cold turkey when he was 50! Glad he did, as cigarettes were of course the worse part of his smoking.
    https://mariettesbacktobasics.blogspot.com/2014/01/our-6-vintage-tobacco-pipes-and-cheroot.html
    Hugs,
    Mariette

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. What a beautiful collection of pipes. I like the one in the ashtray. That is real style.

      God bless, Mariette.

      Delete
    2. Dearest Victor,
      Thank you and yes, that sure is a beauty!
      Hugs,
      Mariette

      Delete
  7. I remember seeing lots of men smoking pipes in the 60s. I used to like the smell of some of the tobacco that had some different flavors. I haven't seen a pipe smoker in years.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Yes, some of the tobacco smoke did smell nice.

      God bless, Bill.

      Delete
  8. My step dad used to smoke a pipe.
    I had an uncle who used to collect pipes, but he never smoked them.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. It's a shame the habit has now gone out of fashion.

      God bless, Happyone.

      Delete
  9. Can;t remember the last time I saw someone smoking a pipe. My Pop used to smoke one when he would try and cut back on cigarettes. I liked the smell...Captain Black I think. Anyway he had all the tools like you say, also had holes in most of his shirts from flying embers.

    ReplyDelete
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    1. Here in Aus, the Port Royal tobacco had the best aroma, people used it for pipes and for roll-your-own ciggies.

      Delete
    2. Oh ... I forgot about the holes in shirts, JoeH. You are right. Also bits of tobacco in the jacket pockets. Those were the good fun days.

      God bless always.

      Delete
  10. You need to look out for molasses licorice, made with natural ingredients, it's good stuff.
    My younger son tried smoking a pipe, he thought it would help him quit the cigarettes, since it takes so long to get a pipe going compared to just lighting up a ciggie. It didn't help, he still smokes, but he's a grown man able to make his own choices.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I found the licorice pipes on Amazon. It's odd that pipe smoking has almost vanished, yet here in the UK you still see people smoking cigarettes. I guess it's a habit that's difficult to break.

      Pipe tobacco did have an aroma, as you say.

      God bless, River.

      Delete
  11. It's quite a few years since I saw anyone smoke a pipe.

    Reading through your comments I spotted Mariette's link, what a lovely collection of pipes she has.

    All the best Jan

    ReplyDelete
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    1. It's a shame pipe smoking is no longer fashionable. Do you remember the St Bruno adverts on UK TV?

      Yes, Mariette has a lovely pipe collection. Truly wonderful.

      God bless, Jan.

      Delete
  12. One of my professors at school smoked a pipe. He wouldn't be allowed to have it in the building now, all smoking indoors in public buildings is banned.

    Sweetie liked a pipe once in so often years ago, but his doctor made him quit when he needed surgery.

    ReplyDelete
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    1. Here too, Mimi, smoking is banned indoors in all public buildings, shops, restaurants and so on.

      God bless always.

      Delete

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