Taxidermy

 

I have started a new hobby now that the Autumn is drawing near. I have to go to evening classes to learn taxidermy. It was either that or flower pressing. I have always wanted a giraffe in our front room with its long neck and head poking out of the window. So I chose taxidermy.

Anyway, I started a taxidermy class. The art of preserving an animal's body via mounting (over an armature) or stuffing, for the purpose of display or study. 

Our lecturer, Mr I Fillem, explained that there are two basic things to learn in taxidermy. First of all, you must ensure that the creature is dead. At a previous lesson someone tried to stuff a live rhinoceros and it stampeded throughout the college causing a lot of damage and panic. Especially when it ran through the art class and they were painting a nude woman at the time. He said he did not know his wife volunteered as a model behind his back ... or in front of his back for that matter. It was embarrassment all round, especially for the rhino who had never been to art classes before.

The second basic thing to learn about taxidermy, according to I Fillem, is to have in mind a clear picture of how you would like the finished product to look. A hippo fighting a shark for instance will not do since there are no sharks in the jungle; unless you happen to take one with you on vacation.

 He suggested we start with a small creature as our first attempt at taxidermy. 

I chose a snail. This was problematic since it was in its shell at the time and we did not know whether it was dead or alive, or indeed hibernating. Snails can hibernate for months apparently.

A tortoise proved to be the same problem since it was also in its shell; unless one were to find a claustrophobic tortoise which would oblige by staying out long enough until it died a natural death. The secondary problem was that tortoises live for a very long time and certainly longer than the 14 weeks which the course was scheduled to last.  

I Fillem suggested I go to the biology class and see if they can spare a dead mouse which I could use as my first subject at taxidermy. It so happened that they had one mouse too many and they obliged by giving it to me.

I took him home that evening and wrapped him in an old sock ready to take with me the next day to taxidermy class. Unfortunately that night our cat discovered the mouse and used it as its play thing.

When I took it to class the instructor said it was too bruised and mangled to do anything with it. 

He suggested I take up flower pressing as a hobby instead. 

A New Hobby You Will Love

 

Have you considered taking on a new hobby or pastime to pass away the hours and perhaps learn something new? Playing a musical instrument perhaps? Or painting or drawing? Knitting, dress-making, jigsaw puzzles or a similar hobby?

I tried to learn to play the bagpipes some years ago. We lived in London at the time, in an apartment block. The neighbours kept interrupting my practising at 3:00 in the morning. They asked me if I could play far away; but I did not have the sheet music for that tune.

On another occasion I joined an evening class at college to learn drawing and painting. This was when we lived in Edinburgh. You would have thought it would have been more appropriate to learn to play the bagpipes instead. Plenty of open spaces to practice in and around Edinburgh. 

We lived very close to the touristy areas of the City and there often was a piper in the street nearby playing the bagpipes and tourists put money in a wooden box. He played every Saturday morning when there were most tourists. He started at eight in the morning - what an unearthly hour. 

I liked a lie-in on Saturdays, the only day I did not work; and on Sundays we went to church at 8:00am. So I wanted some peace on Saturdays. I asked him how much money he made an hour. He said about £10. So I gave him £15 and asked him to shut up.

Back to my evening classes learning to paint. Up to then I had only painted the garden metal fence and gate and not much else. Now I had learnt to draw and paint flowers, bowls of fruit, vases and similar things. One day we were told that we would be painting the nude form. I brought a lot of pink paint with me that evening. A lady came out from behind a screen and took off her negligent, (that's a French gown made in the UK).

Anyway, she stood there naked and I recognised her as my boss' secretary. She had a small beauty spot by her lips and that's how I knew it was her.  

Now I have started another evening course as a hobby. It's taxidermy. The art of preserving an animal's body via mounting (over an armature) or stuffing, for the purpose of display or study. 

Our lecturer, Mr I Fillem, explained that there are two basic things to learn in taxidermy. First of all, you must ensure that the creature is dead. Secondly, you must remember that not all creatures can be stuffed. 

For example, it is very difficult to stuff a worm. The creature wiggles here and there and to and fro and it is difficult to kill it. Also, it is often quite a struggle wrenching it from a bird's beak, and often the bird would fly away as soon as you approach it.

A flea is another creature which is difficult for taxidermy. The best way to preserve it is by pressing it between two pages of a big book. A bit like pressing flowers, only you have to remember which page you pressed him on. This method is only possible with small creatures like fleas, flies, bees, butterflies and such. You cannot press a skunk between two pages because he would soon stink the place.

Our lecturer suggested we start our taxidermy with a small creature, like a mouse. You carefully dissect the creature and take out the insides, and then you fill it with cotton wool and sew it up again. You also use various compounds to dry and preserve the skin.

Unfortunately, when it was my turn to practice we did not have any mice. Our lecturer suggested a rhinoceros instead. 

This required a great deal of cotton and wool compared to a mouse. Besides, the animal attacked me and nearly broke my arm. 

Have you got a favourite hobby to share with us?

NOTE: Needless to say, no creatures have been harmed in the writing of this post!