Once upon a time there was an old man in his nineties living alone in a small cottage in the countryside. He'd farmed there all his life and now he spent the rest of his days there with a dog as old as he.
Once a week a friend visited him for a while for a chat and to help around the house. Just for fun, the old man gave his friend £1 a week to buy him a lottery ticket.
This went on for ages and the friend always checked the old man's lottery ticket for any winnings. One day to his surprise he discovered the old man won £2m.
He was both pleased and very concerned about this. If he told the old man of the winnings the shock could easily kill him.
So he went to the priest for advice and after much debate he convinced the priest that he was better placed to break the news to the old man. After all, priests are trained for all circumstances.
The priest visited the old man and after enjoying a cup of tea and biscuits he approached the subject carefully as the old man was seated down comfortably.
"Life certainly has its twists and turns" started the priest, "and you've certainly seen many in your life I should say!"
The old man nodded.
"Imagine" continued the priest, "another unexpected twist. Imagine ... say ... you won £2m in the lottery. What would you do?"
The old man smiled and said "At my age I've outlived all my relatives and I have few friends to speak of. I suppose if I won £2m I'd give it all to you."
On hearing this the priest had a heart attack and died.
And the moral of the story is:
When you're a certain age never play the lottery.
No ... that's not it.
The moral of the story is never give a priest £2m.
No ... that's not it either. I'm sure there's a moral here but I don't get it.
Sometimes it pays to know when we're already happy.