Sunday 17 January 2021

Happenings in my life


Every now and then I think back at things that happened in my life and ask: Why me?

No one ever answers. Perhaps you will.

Years ago, when I lived in London, a neighbour phoned in the middle of the night, about 3:00am, and said, "Your dog barking is disturbing my sleep."

I said, "Sorry", meaning what are you talking about? Rather than being apologetic. I was half-asleep at the time.

The next morning, I remembered what happened and was upset, especially since I don't even have a dog. So at 3:00am the next night I phoned my neighbour and said, "I don't have a dog!"

When I moved to another house in London, the same thing, only different, happened again. A woman neighbour phoned me at night and said, "Your horse is in my garden!"

Rather stupidly, I replied, "Sorry!", like I did before.

The next morning I went to see her and I told her I have no horse. She said, "that's OK, it was only a  nightmare!" 

Horse ... nightmare ... get it? It comes to something when I have to explain my jokes.

When I moved up North I had a neighbour who imitated birds. I did not mind that she ate worms; but I got really annoyed when she pooped on my car!

Oh come on ... that was a good joke! You're a tough audience.

I was in my early twenties and lived in London. I got involved in politics and could have run for office locally. I used to spend a lot of time during elections knocking on doors and asking people if we could rely on their support; or answering any questions or problems they had in mind. 

I remember once I was with another colleague. We knocked on a door and a young 15 year old opened. I asked, "Are your dad or mom in?"

He shouted upstairs and said, "Daaad ... there's a man to see you!"

A voice from upstairs replied, "Bring him up!"

My colleague decided to stay at the door. I followed the lad upstairs and he took me to a bedroom where a man and a woman were in bed.

He said, "Yeh ... what do you want?"

You can imagine a 22 year old talking politics with a couple who had other things on their minds. 

On another occasion I was knocking at doors in an apartment block. As I was talking to a man at his door, I noticed a woman in her early thirties I would guess, walk up the stairs and say, "Hello Mr Farthing!" to the old gentleman I was talking to. He greeted her back, and she walked up the stairs to the level above. 

After ten minutes or so talking to him; I walked up the stairs to the higher level. We had been taught always to be honest with the voters and give a true answer to questions asked; even though it would not be what the voter wants to hear. They respect an honest politician even if their views differ from our Party.

When I rang the door bell at the apartment above, the woman I saw before opened the door totally naked. She was wearing nothing but a smile. She had obviously seen me knocking at doors and had been waiting for me.

She said, "Yes ... what do you want?"

I was honest. I said, "I forgot ..." and ran away.

Politics taught me a lot!!!!!!

23 comments:

  1. It is much better what our Lord teaches us, we must search the scriptures to see if what we do is right.

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  2. I guess politics DID teach you something, Victor! Recent events here in the States have taught me that it's a dirty business, for sure.
    Blessings!

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    1. I gave up politics because of all the in-fighting between people from the same Party. Everyone, it seems, wanted to promote themselves above all else.

      You do not have to blow out someone else's candle for your light to shine.

      God bless you, Martha.

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  3. I see that you were lost for words with the last woman. What could you have said. :)

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    1. I could have asked her about her views on the rise in inflation!

      Keep smiling, Bill. God bless.

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  4. ...my father told me to NEVER explain a joke!

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    1. I have to explain it, Tom; otherwise I cannot laugh.

      God bless always.

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  5. "I don't have a dog!"

    Now THAT'S funny!

    ;-O

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    1. I didn't have a dog, or a horse!

      God bless, Linda.

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  6. Methinks an honest politician is a rarity. Selfless, too. I suspect a sense of humor might TRUMP any of those voters' pesky reservations.
    (Sorry, I couldn't resist.)

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    1. I tried to be honest, Mevely. Eventually I gave up. (Politics, that is!)

      God bless you.

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  7. Dearest Victor,
    Oh my, what a stories!
    One never knows at times what to reply...
    Hugs,
    Mariette

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    1. That's true, Mariette. I did not know what to reply to her. That's why I ran away.

      God bless.

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  8. Always enjoy visiting and getting a good laugh.

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  9. Nightmare! Ha! You gave me a good laugh and I thank you.

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  10. You did make me grin.

    One time, some men came to see Grandpa and ask him to run for political office. He said he was a doctor not a politician, and they said they understood that, but since he was an honest man and had a good reputation, they would get him elected and then they would tell him how to run things.

    He said no, he wanted to stay a doctor full time, he loved his work. Then he went home and told Grandma. She said, "If you ever go into politics, I'm going to divorce you!"

    He never went into politics, and i'm glad.

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    1. Thank you for sharing your story, Mimi. I learnt at an early age that politics is not a happy business. There was so much jealousy and enmity between people from the same Party.

      God bless.

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  11. Calling back at 3am to say you don't have a dog...Brilliant!
    Nightmare, I got it without explanation, but only because I know your humor. Bird imitation was a bit gross, and I would have run as well from the naked lady.

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    1. Sorry about the bird imitation joke, JoeH. My sense of humour is sometimes ...

      Glad to see you visiting here again. Thanx.

      God bless you.

      Delete

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