Ghosts

 

Do you believe in ghosts? Have you seen one?

I've always wondered about ghosts. Why is it ghosts are always seen in old houses, mansions or castles? Spooky places like that? 

Has there ever been a ghost seen at the frozen food aisle of the local supermarket? That should send a chill down your spine. Or a frisson if it's a French supermarket.

Is it perhaps that ghosts don't like the limelight? Is that why they don't appear in well-lit places like the supermarket?

Do ghosts just appear there standing and doing nothing? Or gliding and vanishing through walls? 

Why aren't they busy doing something when they appear? For example, has anyone ever seen a ghost riding a bicycle? Or making an omelette? Or having a shower? What would a naked ghost look like? And would the water go right through him or slide over him?

What is the intention of a ghost? They appear out of nowhere and go "Wooooh ... Woooooh ..." to frighten people. People run away and leave the ghosts all alone. Alienated from society. Surely it would be wiser to befriend people and sit down with them for a cup of tea and a chat.  

A friend of mine was convinced his car was haunted bu a ghost. He said he often saw someone sitting next to him in the passenger seat whilst he was driving. It happened mostly on long journeys on the highways. Never in slow traffic in town. Maybe that particular ghost had used up his air-miles and needed a ride in my friend's car. Do ghosts travel from one place to another; or do they stay in one place haunting people there?

Anyway, my friend got in touch with an exorcist and asked him to shoo the ghost away. Tell him to move to another faster car perhaps. The exorcist took the car for a drive to see if the ghost makes an appearance. 

When he came back from his ghost test-drive he declared that there was no ghost but the engine needed a change of oil. As it happens. the exorcist was also a car mechanic in his spare time because ghost hunting did not pay much.

By the way, do ghosts always speak the language of the country where they appear? Or can you have, say, a Greek speaking ghost in England? Or a Spanish speaking ghost in France?

Would a Greek speaking ghost carry a dictionary so he could communicate properly in England? And would he speak English with a Greek accent?

I once saw a ghost out at sea. I don't believe in ghosts really; but I did see something, or someone, who looked like a ghost.

It was in an old fishing trawler in the North Sea just off Scotland. I was in my cabin. It was dark, cold, and the sea was very rough. It had been raining and very windy all day. It was at about midnight. I was afraid that we might sink. I had been sea-sick several times. There's nothing like the smell of vomit combined with the fear of seeing a ghost. I must have cried a little because I could feel the tears trickling down my leg.

Then I saw her. It was a female ghost. She stood there and said nothing. She reminded me of Gloria Gaynor.

 At first, I was afraid, I was petrified ... and now I am imagining the look on your face reading this!!!