Taxidermy

 

I have started a new hobby now that the Autumn is drawing near. I have to go to evening classes to learn taxidermy. It was either that or flower pressing. I have always wanted a giraffe in our front room with its long neck and head poking out of the window. So I chose taxidermy.

Anyway, I started a taxidermy class. The art of preserving an animal's body via mounting (over an armature) or stuffing, for the purpose of display or study. 

Our lecturer, Mr I Fillem, explained that there are two basic things to learn in taxidermy. First of all, you must ensure that the creature is dead. At a previous lesson someone tried to stuff a live rhinoceros and it stampeded throughout the college causing a lot of damage and panic. Especially when it ran through the art class and they were painting a nude woman at the time. He said he did not know his wife volunteered as a model behind his back ... or in front of his back for that matter. It was embarrassment all round, especially for the rhino who had never been to art classes before.

The second basic thing to learn about taxidermy, according to I Fillem, is to have in mind a clear picture of how you would like the finished product to look. A hippo fighting a shark for instance will not do since there are no sharks in the jungle; unless you happen to take one with you on vacation.

 He suggested we start with a small creature as our first attempt at taxidermy. 

I chose a snail. This was problematic since it was in its shell at the time and we did not know whether it was dead or alive, or indeed hibernating. Snails can hibernate for months apparently.

A tortoise proved to be the same problem since it was also in its shell; unless one were to find a claustrophobic tortoise which would oblige by staying out long enough until it died a natural death. The secondary problem was that tortoises live for a very long time and certainly longer than the 14 weeks which the course was scheduled to last.  

I Fillem suggested I go to the biology class and see if they can spare a dead mouse which I could use as my first subject at taxidermy. It so happened that they had one mouse too many and they obliged by giving it to me.

I took him home that evening and wrapped him in an old sock ready to take with me the next day to taxidermy class. Unfortunately that night our cat discovered the mouse and used it as its play thing.

When I took it to class the instructor said it was too bruised and mangled to do anything with it. 

He suggested I take up flower pressing as a hobby instead.