A wet man on the beach does not mean he was in the sea.
The shortest day is always in winter.
In the graffiti of life you are a footnote.
A fallen tree in the forest with no witness to see it remains upright.
A bicycle with a broken wheel is not a mono-cycle.
Glasses are for seeing not drinking.
It does not matter whether your cup is half full or half empty as long as it does not leave a stain on the table.
As one door closes another opens outwards and hits you in the face.
The two words to open doors for you in life are "Pull" and "Push".
In the darkest night of your life your torch battery will have died.
If your drink tastes funny, you've squeezed a budgie instead of a lemon.
All roads lead to Rome but only in Italy.
Never leave to tomorrow what you can delegate to someone else today.
And finally ...
During a
check-up the patient asked the Doctor, "Do you think I'll live a long and healthy
life then?"
He replied, "I doubt it somehow. Mercury
is in Uranus right now."
The patient said, "I don't go in for any of that
astrology nonsense."
He replied, "Neither do I. My thermometer
just broke."
