Have you ever wondered?

 

Have you ever wondered why the earth spins round on itself, and indeed spins around the sun? Other planets too spin around on themselves and the sun.

How do they do this, and why? If you pick an orange high up in your hand and let go, it will fall to the ground. It will not spin on itself and around the light bulb hanging from the ceiling.

So how does the earth do this?; and continue to do it for millions of years without stopping?; albeit some people say it is slowing down; (perhaps a bit like you when you wake up in the morning).

My scientist friend said it is to do with the flow of time - whatever that is. He said that as time flows by it makes things spin, like the earth and other planets. It also make them go round the sun. I didn't understand a word he said; my head is still spinning, but not me.

Also, did you know that deep inside the earth as a planet it is very hot; hotter than hell it seems. So I asked, how can it be hot, and what is burning in there, and where is the oxygen coming from to sustain all this burning for millions of years.

My friend said there is no need for oxygen. The heat is the result of pressure. The earth crust, (that's where we are all standing or I am leaning against the bar), is pressing into the centre to keep the whole planet intact. All this pressure is creating heat which stays inside the planet - or comes out sometimes from volcanoes. Apparently we can use this heat in something called geothermal. You drill a hole on the crust of the earth, pump cold water down and it brings up steam under pressure which you use to turn turbines and make electricity.

Oh ... and another thing. How come we are standing on the crust of this planet and we don't fall off? Is it magnetism. Are we stuck on earth because the earth is a magnet and we eat spinach which is made of iron? Or is it gravity? When you drop that orange is it magnetism or gravity that pulls it down to the ground?

I have spent many a sleepless night in Seattle trying to fathom out all these questions. I hope you do the same.

And one more thing. Why are pizzas round, and they come in square boxes, and you cut them into triangles? To defy science, I now cut them into long rectangular strips.

So there!

It's too fast

 

I've been thinking about this logically. See if you agree with me.

The circumference of the Earth at the Equator, is just under 25,000 miles - let's call it 24,000 miles.

If I were to stand on the Equator facing East, (because the Earth turns from left to right - from West to East), then it would take a whole 24 hours for me to be back round to the same point where I started as the Earth revolves one revolution.

So in effect, if we divide 24,000 miles by 24 hours, we can say that by standing there facing East I am travelling at 1000 miles an hour; and my hat would blow off.

I have also calculated that over the years there have been about 120 billion people on this planet since as far back as my calculator can count. This does not include animals, birds, fishes and plants. Just people. All these people and creatures have not left Earth. When they die they are either buried or cremated but they do not leave the planet. 

So it follows, (according to my calculations), that the Earth is getting heavier and it should in fact slow down in its speed of revolutions. And the time will come when it will stop altogether. When this happens one side of the earth will be too hot facing the sun whilst the other side will freeze its pants off.

But right now, the Earth seems to be going faster not slower. Here's some proof:

Do you realise that COVID was about six years ago? It hardly seems like yesterday!

Look at other world events - count how long ago they happened and then wonder how time flies and how fast the world is going round.

Think about that new dress you just bought. It is out of fashion before you have worn it twice.

And the garden gate and fence need painting again. It hardly seems two years since you last painted them. 

We are already through two months of the New Year and Christmas only ten months away.

No sooner does one week start than it is already over.  

I asked a zoologist friend of mine who specialises in the digestive system of cockroaches to explain it all to me. 

He said that this is because with social media and so many means of communications too many things are happening on the globe at the same time. In the Olden Days when people had no communications the only change they had was the traffic lights going from red to green. Those with no traffic lights had no change at all in their lives. 

These days with 24/7 communications there is something happening all the time somewhere on the planet and it is on all the NEWS media instantly even before it happens.

Note how Australians celebrate the New Year before everyone else. This did not happen in Olden Days because we had no radios and TVs to watch it happening.

So because too many things are happening at once all the time, then time itself is moving faster to accommodate all these things happening.

Think about this logic again:

Because too many things are happening at once all the time, then time itself is moving faster to accommodate all these things happening. 

So slow down. Don't have fast foods. Try a casserole that takes ages to cook. And don't tell us about it or anyone else. The less news we share the slower life gets, (or seems to). 

Go back to the days when you had to get off your chair to change the channels on your TV. Or better still; take your TV with you in bed.

Or take your pet with you in bed. 

I did that once. I took my pet to bed with me. The next morning the bed was soaking wet and my goldfish died.

Know your planet

 

OUR PLANET EARTH.

Earth is the third planet from the Sun and is the largest of the terrestrial planets. The Earth is the only planet in our solar system not to be named after a Greek or Roman deity. The Earth is the only known planet to support life - not necessarily intelligent life.

The Earth’s rotation is gradually slowing. This deceleration is happening almost imperceptibly, at approximately 17 milliseconds per hundred years. At this rate the Earth will one day stop totally and one half will be always daylight whilst the other half will be dark with all night parties 24/7. 

Earth has a powerful magnetic field. This phenomenon is caused by the nickel-iron core of the planet, coupled with its rapid rotation. This field protects the Earth from the effects of solar wind. Be careful if you take minerals tablets in your diet, especially iron, as you may get stuck to the Earth and unable to move. This happens a lot to people with a magnetic personality.

70% of the Earth’s surface is covered in water. When astronauts first went into the space, they looked back at the Earth with human eyes for the first time, and called our home the Blue Planet. And it’s no surprise. 70% of our planet is covered with oceans. So there is no need to add water or ice to your whisky. A large percentage of whisky and other drinks is water anyway.

Earth doesn’t take 24 hours to rotate on its axis. It’s actually 23 hours, 56 minutes and 4 seconds. This is the amount of time it takes for the Earth to completely rotate around its axis; astronomers call this a sidereal day. This is because the Earth is putting on weight and gets heavier each year and is slowing down. Very much like an overweight person takes longer to turn round when pirouetting.  

A year on Earth isn’t 365 days. It’s actually 365.2564 days. It’s this extra .2564 days that creates the need for leap years. That’s why we tack on an extra day in February every 4 years. On average, people born on 29 February don't necessarily live longer than the rest of us. 

The Earth is not actually round in shape. In fact, it is geoid. This simply means that the rounded shape has a slight bulge towards the equator. So what causes this geoid shape? This happens solely because the rotation of the Earth which causes the bulge around the equator. If, like me, you don't care about this; just ignore it and read on.

Only 3% water of the earth is fresh. The other 97% is salted. Of that 3%, over 2% is frozen in ice sheets and glaciers. Means less than 1% fresh water is found in lakes, rivers and underground. Save water - drink whisky neat!

The Earth tilts at roughly 66 degrees. So do I after a few whiskies.

= = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = =

The Earth's surface is 70% water. That water is un-carbonated. Therefore, the Earth is flat.

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What's the fastest liquid on earth? Milk. It's pasteurized before you see it.

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Two aliens are flying near earth

The first one says, "The dominant life form here have developed satellite based nuclear weapons."
The second one says, "Are they an emerging intelligence?"
The first one says, "I don't think so, they have it aimed at themselves."

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Aliens visit Earth. They come in peace and surprisingly, they speak English.

Obviously, all of the heads of government and religious leaders want to speak to the aliens so they set up a meeting with our new visitors. When it's the Pope's turn, he asks: "Do you know about our Lord and Saviour Jesus Christ?"
 

"You mean JC?", responds the alien. "Yeah, we know Him! He's the greatest, isn't He? He swings by every year to make sure that we are doing ok".

Surprised, the Pope follows up with: "He visits every year?! It's been over two millennia and we're still waiting for his SECOND coming!"
 

 The alien sees that the Pope has become irate at this fact and starts trying to rationalize. "Maybe He likes our chocolate better than yours?"
 

 The Pope retorts, "Chocolates? What are you talking about? What does that have to do with anything?"
 

The alien says "Yea, when He first visited our planet we gave Him a huge box of chocolates! Why? What did you guys do?"

Doing my bit

 

There's so much talk these days about saving the environment, helping the planet, reducing our carbon footprint, plastic waste, global warming, climate change and similar slogans that mean very little to most people.

We did not have all this when we were young. The planet seemed able to look after itself without our interference. 

The other day I was in the library standing by the Natural History section reading a book. A man approached me and said, "Do you realise that whilst you've been standing here they have pulled down 25 square miles of rain forest?"

So I moved somewhere else. I don't want to be blamed for the deforestation of any forest. 

I sat at a table reading. The man next to me was reading a book on World Population. Apparently, there's over 8 billion of us. He was reading a chapter on births and deaths. He told me, "Do you know, every time I breath in and out a person dies." I suggested he uses a better mouthwash.

In my own minuscule way, I am doing my bit to save the planet.

I have now decided to wash only half of my car at a time. Some weeks I wash the left side, other weeks the right side of the car. I plan beforehand where I'll be parking my car and whether people on the side-walk will see the left or right side of the vehicle. I'm saving water, soap, and ultimately the planet.

I've also decided to stop adding ice or water in my whisky. I drink it neat saving more water.

I often look at people from on top of my spectacles to save wearing out the lenses.

I used to walk home following the route the bus would take from town in order to save money. Now I follow the route the taxi would have taken and save even more money.

When people ask me for help or favours I usually make an excuse and ignore them thus saving the energy it would take in doing what they want or need. My wife is particularly upset about this; but I ignore her for the sake of the planet.

So you see, all this saving the planet and the environment talk is good as far as I'm concerned because I can get away from doing a lot of chores. Like painting the fence and gate - I said let's save some paint and do the job in a year or so. Like mowing the lawn - let's save electricity and not use the lawnmower that often; how about doing it next month. Like visiting the in-laws - let's save some gas and do it next year.

If you put your mind to it there's a lot of jobs you can postpone and procrastinate on in the name of saving the planet! What do you think?

I am getting tired ...

 

I am getting tired of being told what I should do in life by some so-called expert fathead on TV.

There was a program on TV blaming me for all the pollution out at sea harming and killing the fish. 

I'll have you know that I live miles from the sea and all my trash goes in separate bins to be re-cycled or dealt with according to what the so-called experts think is appropriate. I dispose of my trash according to the instructions given by the local Authorities. Can anyone explain to me how it ends in the sea? And how this is my fault?

Then there was another fathead expert on another program advising us all to stop eating meat to save the planet. He didn't say who we are saving the planet for. Idiots like him?

He claimed that animals such as cows, sheep and so on let off gases at both ends of their bodies and that this is bad for the ozone layer. His solution was that we stop eating meat and have fewer animals.

Now I don't mind people being vegetarians or people eating meat. It is a personal choice. But I resent being told and coerced into following a particular lifestyle because some idiot has deemed it necessary.

Has this man worked out what the world would be like if all of us on earth stopped eating meat? What would we do with all the cows, sheep, pigs, chickens and other creatures on our daily menu? Would we kill them all to extinction and burn them on a funeral pyre? 

Where would we find a substitute for all the milk produced; and milk by-products like cheese, yoghurt, cream and so on? Can you make cheese from almond milk? Does this man realise how many gallons of water are needed to produce just one almond? And how many almonds you need just to make one pint of almond milk?

Has he worked out the effect on the world economies if we all stopped eating meat? Why, my favourite fast food restaurant selling burgers and fried chicken employs six people alone. That's six people who will be out of work. How about all the others who farm animals, feed them, milk them, shear their wool to make woollen ties for me, collect their eggs to make omelettes for my breakfast, and so on and so forth? 

In short, I don't think that if we all stopped eating all meats it would have that much beneficial effect on the ozone layer as this man if he stopped guffing hot air from the orifices at both ends of his body. 

By all means, he can stop eating meat. That's more left for me and those who agree with me. Let him not lecture me on TV under the guise of expert in stupidity.

As for those who worry about plastic and other trash ending in the sea. Instead of blaming the consumer, why not get the producer to clean up their act? Why is it I can buy pasta and rice from one supermarket in plastic bags that are totally recyclable, whilst in other supermarkets pasta and rice, (and other products), are in bags that cannot be recycled? The price is exactly the same. So why do the producers not use recyclable plastic? The same applies to plastic containers for milk, shampoo, washing up liquid, lemonades and so on. Some are in recyclable plastic, others not.

And why are some products double and treble wrapped? You buy a presentation box of chocolates, or biscuits, or whatever and it is wrapped in cellophane, it's in a cardboard box, and inside you have plastic trays containing no more than 12 tiny chocolates, or biscuits. The same applies for many ready-meals you quick-cook in the oven. It's as if the only way you can have a square meal these days is by eating the boxes rather than their content. More vitamins this way too!

So, Mr Fathead on TV, instead of lecturing the poor consumer about saving the planet, laudable as this is; why don't you first tackle the problem at source? Eating meat has a lot of nutritional benefits which you may choose to avail yourself of, or not. Eating cardboard boxes on the other hand will provide you with some roughage but I doubt whether it will control your hot air emissions.