It makes sense

 

When I was young I liked reading all the super heroes stories in magazines. Superman, Batman and Robin, The Hulk, and all the others. My favourite was Spider Man. He was bitten by a spider and developed super powers of flying through the air making spiders web everywhere. No doubt followed by Super Clean, a hero with a vacuum cleaner and brush, clearing the cobwebs left behind.

As a child I was bitten by our small dog Santa. We called him that because when we first got him he left us little presents everywhere. It was not much of a bite. Just a nip really. But I was certain I developed special powers like Spider Man.

From that day, I was convinced I had a heightened sense of smell. I could smell in the dark and round corners. A gift which I have retained to this day.

I could tell people by their smells. My grandma for instance always smelled of lavender. Why do old people have that distinguished smell of plants or herbs? My other grandma smelled of pot-pourri whereas her sister, Aunt Gertrude from Australia, smelled of eucalyptus. At the time I did not know what eucalyptus was, but Mom told me it's a plant grown in Australia. Apparently, Aunt Gertrude used oil of eucalyptus in cough drops and sweets. She gave me one once. It tasted awful and made me cry ... inwardly of course. Because real heroes don't cry.

I also had an uncle who wore a black suit that smelled of moth balls. I did not know that moths had such large balls; but Mom explained it was a chemical disinfectant to keep moths away from clothes. My uncle only wore that suit at weddings and funerals. The rest of the time he smelled of whisky. Dad told me it was his after-shave lotion. Mom added that it was called Single Malt distilled in Scotland.

In church we had an old confessional made of wood. It was a wooden booth where the priest sat and the penitents would kneel on either side and confess through a small window. I remember once in Confession, as I knelt in the confessional I told the priest that I had hidden my grandma's motorcycle helmet behind the couch. She did not ride a motorcycle, she just wore the helmet as a precaution in case she got mugged ... so she said. 

Anyway, the priest told me to keep my voice down because he could smell my grandma kneeling on the other side of the confessional. He did not tell me which grandma it was, the lavender one or the pot-pourri one.

I was very proud as a child of my super powered smelling abilities. It compensated for being bitten by Santa.

I'm still proud of the power of super smell. I can tell as soon as I enter the house that my wife has cremated another dinner. I wish we still had some of Aunt Gertrude's eucalyptus oil.

Nothing makes sense anymore

 

Nothing seems to make sense any more. We are all encouraged to walk instead of using the car in order to save the planet. So I started walking to work. It takes me hours and I get tired. My normal commuting by car is just over an hour-and-a-half; but walking takes about three times that long. 

My boss is not sympathetic about saving the planet. He asked me why I live in the town I commute from? I told him because my house is there. He suggested that I get back to commuting by car and let the planet look after itself. 

How about you? Do you walk long distances that would take hours by car? I once tried walking to Edinburgh on holiday. I got tired with carrying all the luggage by the time I got to the end of our road.

They advise us to take the bus to town when shopping. I tried that. The problem is that all the shops are a distance apart from each other and there's a limit to how much one can carry from shop to shop and then to the bus station. 

It's just as bad if you go by car. The car park is often on the edge of the shopping centre/mall. So you end up doing some shopping; going to the car to off-load; going back to do some more shopping; back to the car and so on. 

Why can't they have drive-in shops like in the old days with drive-in cinemas. You could drive to the meat counter and pick up a joint of meat; then to the bakery section; frozen foods and so on. All your shopping done from the comfort of your car seat.

Anyway, I also have another problem now. I bought a very powerful vacuum cleaner. It said in the advert it is the most powerful vacuum cleaner in the world. I tried to vacuum clean the car because it was full of cookies crumbs and dust. The vacuum cleaner is so powerful that it sucked in the whole car. Does anyone know how to get a car out of a vacuum cleaner? 

Now I have no car and can't drive a vacuum cleaner to work. My driving licence does not allow it.

This makes less sense

I recently wrote (yesterday) that nothing makes sense any more in this crazy world of ours. It seems to me that we are all being slowly, (or not so slowly), influenced by social media, by TV and by magazines to behave in a way we would not have thought of behaving forthwith, (or fore before - if there is such a word).

I read two articles recently which seem to me to be crazy, yet they portray how you can influence behaviour in this modern sophisticated crazy world we live in.

The first one suggests that we should do our household chores in the nude. "It is liberating", explained the article. It makes you break free and uninhibited from the tedious essentials of housework which entrap us all.

We all have to sweep, and dust, and vacuum clean every now and then. Or make the beds, or tidy up, or load the washing machine, the dishwasher or whatever else we have to do at home. These are essentials that we cannot escape. So why not escape them mentally, if not physically, by taking all our clothes off and do these tedious boring jobs in the nude. Totally naked. As the day we were born. As nature intended.

The magazine article had a number of pictures of men and women doing various jobs in their birthday suits and several quotes from various people, (real or fictitious - I don't know), saying how they enjoyed the new experience of working naked and how they recommend it to others.

I can see how this would influence some people to try it for themselves. Although personally I would dread being naked in close proximity of a vacuum cleaner nozzle.

The second article is just as crazy.

It suggested that a number of people are using social media to show off their houses and gardens by posting fake pictures of various rooms in their home. They show off a new kitchen for instance, or a new lounge, dining room or whatever. But the photos used are fake taken from the internet or from other photo sources. Similarly, they show off new gardens they have had re-designed, swimming pools, cars and so on.

In effect, it is keeping up with the Joneses on social media rather than for real.

In these days when everyone seems to have a million "friends" on social media, (and perhaps none in real life), it feels good to boast about one's home, garden or whatever without the risk of ever being found out as being a fake.

I guess this too is liberating in some form or another. You are living the dream on the internet, and in your mind, if not in real life.

So ... what do you think of either or both of these stories?

Would you consider doing your housework totally naked? (I remember reading about an old gentleman who hired a cleaner and paid good money as long as she cleaned his home in the nude - but that's another story).

Or would you post a fake photo of your home to show off how well you are doing in life?

Let's talk sense

In Catholic churches we have incense burning at certain Masses - e.g. Christmas, Easter and special occasions. It's nice I suppose and reminds me of ancient traditions when people burnt incense in churches and homes. The wise men, as we know, brought incense to baby Jesus as a gift. Burning incense traditionally was part of worship. The smoke going up to Heaven no doubt took up our prayers with them.

Does your church burn incense during services?

Do you burn incense at home?