It was about five o’clock in the morning when I heard a sound outside in the front garden. It sounded like cats fighting.
I looked out of the front window and saw two cats chasing each other in our garden. One of them, doing the chasing, was our tom cat. The other one was some female cat owned by someone down our street.
Our tom cat must have been making advances to his girl friend because he was carrying a bunch of flowers and a box of chocolates, figuratively speaking you understand. But the other cat was either playing hard to get or was not at all interested in his amorous advances. How am I to know? It’s difficult enough for us men to understand women let alone female cats!
Anyway … both cats were jumping all over the garden and in the street like hares do in early March. And in all their jumping my cat landed hard on the side of my neighbours car setting off the alarm.
Both cats flew away and I was left there at the window watching the lights in the car going on and off and the alarm sounding loudly enough to awaken the whole neighbourhood.
Minutes later our neighbour came out bare feet and in his pyjamas. As he approached his car he must have slipped on the damp grass and landed hard on his backside. He switched off the alarm using a remote control key whilst still sitting on the wet grass.
Before he managed to get up his little dog terrier came out running from the house barking like mad and running down the street.
The neighbours wife then came out in her negligent. (I bet you’re all looking this word in your dictionary. I like using French words in my stories – it adds class!)
She helped him up and he got in the car to go and fetch the runaway dog. For some reason, instead of going forwards he reversed hurriedly and mounted the side-walk hitting a tree behind him. He let out some profane words which I will not repeat here and then drove off at speed.
His wife waited for him in the street.
About ten minutes later he returned and got out of the car with the little dog in hand.
The thing is … do I tell him that it was my cat who set off the car alarm or not?
What do you think?