Tuesday 7 December 2021

Memories

 

I don't know why sometimes our thoughts turn to times gone by when we were young and the world was a totally different place. 

I was lying in bed the other day thinking back to when I was younger. I used to like it so when my parents used to read to me before I got to sleep. Books like, "Algorithms and Logarithms", "Trigonometry for Beginners", "Teach Yourself Genealogy In Three Generations" and such other subjects. I remember I was 18 at the time, and this went on until I was 21.

Then my parents suggested it was time I left home. They said they needed my room to store dad's motorbike. It must have been difficult for him carrying the bike up and down the stairs every day; especially since my room was in the attic.

Anyway, by coincidence, that's when I found a job in London. So I moved out of home and lived in an apartment there. My first job was at a veterinary practice. I had to chew hay for a horse with no teeth. I also had to taste various dog foods for dogs on a special diet.

I then left that job and worked for one of those Vehicle Rescue Services - you know, if your car stops they come out to fix it. I was an assistant to one of their mechanics. One day as he was answering a call he started crying. I thought he was heading for a breakdown!

I then worked for a freelance scientist. He had his own lab and hoped to invent things and solve every day problems. For example: If buttered toast always lands butter side down, and cats always land on their feet; what would happen if you tie a buttered toast to a cat?

He also invented an instant laxative. But that did not sell either. 

I then worked at a Job Centre. I lasted a week and then got fired. I returned the next day to ask them for a job. They had a new manager and I got hired again.

I applied for a job as a statistician and told them I was willing to give 110%. They did not give me the job on account I could not count.

I then worked for an Australian psychiatrist who had just opened a practice in London. His chat with his patients was always the same, "Gday ..., Gday ... How ye doing? No worries. Too easy. Next!"

He always gave his patients a boomerang as they left to ensure they returned. 

My job at the practice was answering the phone; but it was never for me.

Then I got a job in a shipyard welding large pieces of sheet metal together. It was riveting.

A while later I quit my job at the helium gas factory because I didn't like being spoken to in that voice.

What are your memories of jobs you have done?

22 comments:

  1. ...life is make of memories.

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  2. "A while later I quit my job at the helium gas factory because I didn't like being spoken to in that voice."

    Ha ha! Reminds me of the comedian Steven Wright. 😂

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  3. You've had some interesting jobs to say the least, Victor! I really liked the quip about the helium factory - lol!
    Blessings!

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    1. I can still hear the manager's voice in that factory.

      God bless, Martha.

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  4. Dearest Victor,
    Those were quite some humorous memories summed up!
    Last night I found time reading half of your book 'Take Care of My Sheep'. So well written!!!
    Hugs,
    Mariette

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    1. You are so very kind to me, Mariette. I'm so pleased you like my book "Take Care of My Sheep". I try my best to write Christian books that readers would enjoy.

      Thank you so much.

      God bless.

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  5. LOL, a job in a helium factory and all speaking in that voice. :) That would drive a person insane. Are you insane? :)

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    1. I did fall in the river in Paris once ... I was in Seine at the time.

      God bless, Bill.

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  6. Thanks for the smiles. You lasted longer on some jobs than I did, even if I had more practice!
    Again, I am still smiling about the dog food tasting. I believe some folks think dog food is taste tested... by humans.
    Sherry & jack headed for the road.

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    1. I wonder if they do have anyone taste dog foods. How do they know if the dogs will like it?

      Keep smiling my friends.

      God bless, Jack and Sherry.

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  7. LOLOLOL! I confess having to re-read a couple of these before the little light bulb went on. You're far quicker than me!

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    1. I am so happy that they made you laugh, Mevely. My success is when my readers laugh.

      God bless always.

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  8. You've had some interesting jobs. :)

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  9. Did you ever have a job at a tailor shop? My understand is the work is sew/sew.

    At least you aren't an elevator operator, they really have their ups and downs.

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    1. Brilliant ... I should have used them in my post. Thanx Mimi.

      God bless.

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  10. Your parents read you to sleep at age 18?? They're supposed to do that when you are a baby and toddler. Baby brains are like sponges, you could have absorbed all that Algorithm knowledge and been top of the class forever.
    I have good memories of almost all the jobs I've had, the exception being that chicken place where dead and plucked chickens went past us girls on a high conveyor chain, they were hanging by their feet and we had to check for left over feathers and any unlaid eggs still inside the birds. That was a bad enough job, but worst of all was the laundry where trucks unloaded soiled linens from restaurants and hospitals. The stink was too much and I only did the one day. Didn't even go back to get the day's pay. Other jobs were much better, the shoe factory being the best. I'd still be there now if the factory hadn't moved its operations overseas.

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    1. When I was a toddler they read me books about Shakespeare, Chaucer, Kipling and so on to encourage me to write.

      You've had some interesting jobs too, River. You should write about them on your Blog.

      God bless.

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