Advice

 

We all need advice from time to time. Usually we seek advice from someone we trust, someone we love, a person whose opinion we respect and value, an individual who will consider our problem and give honest practical advice.

Some people even seek advice from the Internet. Not always the best thing to do, but I can understand their desire to do so, hiding behind some sort of anonymity. 

Other people talk over their problems with complete strangers. You'd be surprised the number of people who speak to me when on the bus and before you know it they are telling me their life's problems and seeking my opinion. 

I usually like to sit quietly on the bus eating pickled onions, or beetroot, or cucumbers from various jars I carry with me for emergencies. And yet somehow, I always attract some stranger seeking advice. Only the other day I was enjoying some chilli con carne on the bus when someone asked me for my views about the UK's economic policy towards the European Community now that we have left the EEC. I told him that olives are too expensive.

When you seek advice it is important that you value the person you seek advice from. You do not want someone who'll sympathise with you, however genuine that is, and just tell you what you want to hear. What's the use of that? You might as well seek advice from a mirror.

In Olden Days people used to go to oracles to seek advice. The oracles would look into chicken entrails and tell you what you should do. Usually they worked in groups; but sometimes there were singletons doing such work. They were called monocle. The practice of looking into chicken's entrails has now stopped because the chickens used would stop laying eggs.

I normally ask advice from people who will be interested in what I say, especially if it is not their speciality and they can take an open-minded view of my problem. For example, I would go to a lawyer and ask him for advice on how to mend a leaking faucet. It is not his speciality, but it would certainly focus his mind in giving me a practical solution.

Recently I asked my plumber about a medical problem I had. I told him I had water on the knee. He said I was not aiming straight.

This giving advice unrelated to one's profession seems to be spreading. I was at the doctor's last week and he asked me, "do you have a problem passing water?"

I replied, "I get a little dizzy when crossing a river ... !"

He told me to lie on his couch. I asked him why. He said, "I want to vacuum clean just where you're standing. The cleaner has not come in today. She is also a Counsellor at the local Home For Distressed Weasels."

So there you have it. Always seek advice before you make a decision. It does not matter whether you take the advice or not. If you take the advice and things don't work out well you can blame it on the advisor. In some cases you might also be able to sue him in Court for bad advice. True ... ask an electrician or a fishmonger ... they'll tell you. It is not their field of specialism, so they're bound to be right.