Friday 24 January 2020

Avoiding People

I am sure this has happened to you. If you're honest you'd admit to it. You're busy, rushing from shop to shop, you need to get home before you have to go out again and do umpteen other jobs in a busy life which you lead. And then, just as you'd wish it the least, you see someone you know.

You do not want to stop and have a chat. You know this person will hold you up, talking about this and that, and sharing their problem at a time when you can least afford it. And you are too polite to say, "Why don't you go away and pester someone else and leave me in peace!"

So what do you do? You pretend not to have seen them. You turn the other way. Pretend to be looking at some goods in the shop. Or better still, leave the shop in a hurry to avoid them all together!

Well ... that happened to me the other day. Just before Christmas it was. I was in this huge department store and I was wandering about in the men's section looking for a new shirt when I suddenly saw up ahead our priest, Father Mirth.

That's not his real name actually. I call him Father Mirth on account that he is the most miserable priest I have ever met. I always thought that priests should have an air of hopefulness, inner peace and joy which they share with all they meet. Not him. He is so miserable he would not raise a smile at a funeral.

I reckon when they recruited him as a priest, miserableness must have been the top quality in the job description. He fitted the job perfectly since he was the only one to apply in that year.

Anyway, I had been avoiding Father Mirth recently. Certainly since my Christmas confession on account of me being honest. He was telling me about his sermons on Sundays and I let it be known that I found them sleep-inducing. I got caught in a trap, you see. Had I said I liked his sermons very much I would be telling a lie - and in a confessional too! Had I told him the truth, which I did, this led to him avoiding me and me avoiding him ever since.

And another thing ... I had confessed that when the washing machine broke down, and I forgot to ring the man to come and fix it, I then put my socks and other clothing in the dishwasher instead. I mean ... it is all water and soap is it not? My wife did not see it this way and got very upset. We had a row. Why can't women be more reasonable? To make things worse Father Mirth sided with my wife when I confessed and said I should apologise to her, and as a penance I had to buy her something nice.

And now there he was. In a department store only a few feet away from me. How could I avoid him without making it appear too obvious that I was avoiding him?

I tried to get out the store, but the exit was right where he was standing. So I quickly picked up a hat from a shelf, put it low on my head. And stood very still pretending to be a store mannequin. That way, hopefully, he would pass by and not notice me.

That didn't happen, did it? He walked towards me and said, "Hello there. That hat suits you and matches your bow tie perfectly!"

I smiled and mumbled confessing, "I was joking ... I thought you'd think I am a mannequin!"

"They don't make mannequins as ugly as you!" was his quick reply.

See what I mean? He is totally miserable and has a way of showing it.

And for the record, I am not ugly at all. Someone once described me as a sex symbol for women who do not care.

20 comments:

  1. I have to say that this post brought back memories of my trying to avoid patients I would come across in the store! Hiding in the the aisles, it is so embarrassing!! Have a brand day!

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    1. It is always embarrassing when trying to avoid someone.

      God bless, Cathy

      Delete
  2. I'm guilty of avoiding people too. Sometimes it's much easier that way.

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    1. Indeed it is easier than having to listen to all their boring stories.

      God bless you, Kathy.

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  3. You do have your problems in your everyday life Victor.
    You were lucky that the store didn't assume that you were shoplifting that hat and tried to arrest you in front of a priest or you could have been the subject of his sermon the following Sunday on "Thou shalt not steal."

    God Bless You Victor 💮

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    1. I never thought of that, Jan. Perhaps I could have pretended I wanted to buy the hat. Anything to avoid Father Mirth.

      God bless.

      Delete
  4. LOL. It reminded me of the many times, I would "hide" when the doorbell rang when my kids were little. I'd make them hush up and stand perfectly still until the "intruder" left. Thanks for a good laugh today, Victor.

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    1. So glad you enjoyed today's post, Diane.

      God bless you and yours.

      Delete
  5. LOVE how, more often than not, your wit hits close to home. Yep, been there, done that.
    Another thing: Methinks your Father Mirth is probably jealous.

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    1. Yes we've all done that ... tried to avoid someone when we're in a hurry. Fr Mirth is always miserable.

      God bless you, Mevely.

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  6. I was thinking the same as Jan. You'd be arrested fr shoplifting. I know what you mean about avoiding people. I do it too, my guess is that there are lots of people who do that. I would love to avoid doing that too but unfortunately there are plenty of unpleasant people and you just have to avoid them. :) Have a fantastic weekend, Victor.

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    1. I see what you mean, Bill. Not just the unpleasant ones but the ones who go on and on when you're in a hurry.

      Have a great weekend. God bless.

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  7. Father Mirth may be miserable, but he sure is quick on the comeback! And yes, it seems we always run into someone we know when we have the least time to actually chat.
    Blessings, Victor!

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    1. Especially when what they are telling you is something you already know because they told you it the last time you tried to avoid them and failed to do so. I often wish to interrupt and say, "I've already heard this story from the last time we met!"

      God bless you, Martha.

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  8. Have you ever thought of the people who are trying to avoid you too? : )

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    1. Avoiding me? Well, I know Father Mirth has tried a few times. But I can't think of anyone else. Apart from ... and ... and also ... and I nearly forgot ...

      God bless, Happyone.

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  9. It sounds like the encounter didn't go as badly as you could have feared.

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    1. You're right Mimi. He could have been upset at me avoiding him.

      God bless.

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  10. I have been known to skip an aisle at the store...

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