Thursday 8 October 2020

Leave me alone ...



I'd had a long and difficult day. I wanted to relax. I sat there on the settee in front of the TV accompanied by a pizza and a Guinness. They are usually good companions when I'm alone at home. Together with a chocolate as well. It's what I call a well balanced meal.

There was something and nothing on TV. You know, the sort of detective program where you watch and don't in fact take it in. You're just watching for the sake of watching because there's nothing better before you finish your meal and doze off in front of the TV anyway. 

The telephone rang. I have an extension phone receiver next to the settee to save me getting up. I tried teaching the dog to answer the phone but he is too stupid. He just picks up the receiver and barks at it. The person at the other end thinks they've phoned a pet store, or a dog rescue home, and just hang up.

Anyway, the phone rang and I picked it up thinking it was the wife and children saying they'd arrived in Glasgow to visit aunt Elma for a few days.

It was not my wife on the phone. It was  a stupid woman asking me if I wanted to pay cheaper electricity. At 8:30 in the evening, I have a stupid woman asking me if I wanted cheaper electricity. Has she nothing better to do?

We have a system in the UK whereby you can get electricity from different suppliers at different contractual prices. Say you're with Company A, you ask to be moved to Company B; and it happens automatically. You still retain the same electricity meters which count how much electricity you have used; but from a given date you pay a different Company. There are many such companies to choose from. Same with the gas supply that comes into your house through pipes.

This stupid woman explained that by changing suppliers I could save at least £30 a year. That's about $39. I told her I was not interested.

She said I could change to greener electricity. I said I did not care what colour my electricity was. She explained that some electricity is made by burning fossil fuels; this is not environmentally friendly. And that by changing to green energy, such as solar, or wind powered, or even wave powered energy I could reduce my carbon footprint.

For a start, I did not know that the size of my footprint could change. You just wear a certain size shoes and that's that. Why change to a tighter smaller size and risk getting sore feet or worse like bunions or carbuncles. As for my footprint being made of carbon ... what's that?

Anyway, what is the point of having electricity made by solar power, or wind or even waves? I want my electricity all the time; not when it is sunny, or windy or the sea is stormy. How do people get electricity at night, or on a calm day or when the sea is as peaceful as a pool of oil? At least burning things, like books, produces enough heat to make electricity. And there are so many bad books aren't there? (Not mine).

My guess is that most people would rather pay the least for their energy, rather than pay more to get electricity from sustainable sources and save the planet. I may be wrong.

She tried to explain. I told her as politely as I could that I was not interested. I picked up a piece of pizza. The pepperoni and sausage slices slid off onto my lap with a generous dose of tomato sauce. I cursed under my breath. Put the pizza back on the plate and tried to clean my trousers as best I can with a serviette. 

She kept on talking. I just put the phone down on her and cut the conversation off. The music played on the TV signifying the end of the program. I did not know who did it. Did the detective catch the murderer? Who was it and how did he do it?

We have a TV system over here called +1. Say you're watching a TV station called Aurora. If you go to Aurora +1 you can see the same program but an hour later. So if I quickly go to the +1 channel I can see the program again which is about to start. What a nuisance. Just because of the stupid electricity woman I now have to watch the program all over again from the start to see who did it.

If I do that, I'll miss the soap program on another channel which does not have a +1 feature. 

What a dilemma. See the soap program, or the detective film all over again?

Or perhaps I should ring the electricity lady and spoil her TV viewing by asking her what are my different choices of electricity and gas Companies.

Oh by the way ... we have another TV feature over here whereby you see a program and towards the end you can choose what ending you want. They show most of the program, then at the end during the adverts you can e-mail the TV company and choose an ending out of three or four they have filmed. The one with most votes, (happy, sad, tragic, or funny), is the one they broadcast as an ending.

Whilst watching The Titanic, I e-mailed them and said I wanted an ending where they sink the iceberg. They replied that I was stupid.

17 comments:

  1. ...it's a rare day when I receive a phone call from someone I want to talk to!

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  2. How I hate those types of calls, Victor, but you managed to turn it into an excuse for hilarity. Well done!
    Blessings!

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    1. The thing is, Martha, I never asked to change electricity supplier. How many people do they think will suddenly make that decision on the spur of the moment because of a phone call?

      God bless.

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  3. Thanks to Caller ID, if I don't recognize the name/number I simply won't answer. (Wish I could say the same for hubby; he thrives on chaos and controversy.)

    ANYWAY. I love that idea of viewers choosing a show's finale. Perhaps it will catch on here someday?

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    1. I must admit Mevely, when I'm in a good mood, and have nothing better to do, I do engage in conversation with telephone callers. Once I had someone from a computer firm telling me my computer had a problem and he could fix it if I allowed him access to my system through the internet. Now this is dangerous. Never allow someone access to your computer online. They can copy/paste all your hard-drive with all your information.

      I told him I'd loaned my computer to my neighbour. Could he wait on the phone till I got it. I kept him waiting for a few minutes then told him my neighbour was out.

      As for shows' finales. They do this on some soap type programs. Obviously they cannot change the endings of films like Titanic. I wrote in just to annoy them.

      God bless.

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    2. Scary about the computer. Imagine, if some naive senior citizen we're to fall for their scam. As a young girl, my #2 grand had a pretty severe speech defect that made understanding her difficult, if not sometimes impossible. When a telemarketer would call, my son used to put Chloe on the phone and tell her it was Santa Claus. :)

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    3. Mevely, the computer scam is real. It happened to someone I know. Fortunately, they realised quickly what they'd done allowing a phone caller into their computer remotely. They quickly unplugged the computer cutting power to the PC and the modem. Even though this was done; we have to clean the computer in case of viruses. It took ages to re-format the hard-drive and re-install the programs.

      I would advise you do not keep personal financial data on your computer linked to the internet. If possible, keep such data on a separate computer NOT linked on the internet.

      Good trick your son did to the telemarketers. Sometimes I answer them in a foreign accent, "Allo eeet eez mee, I understand not zee language, n'est ce pas? Oui monsieur!" They soon hang up.

      God bless, Mevely.

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  4. I do what Mevely does, don't answer if I don't know the caller. Figure if is important they will call back.
    Did enjoy your story thoug!

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    1. I agree, Happyone. I answered because I was expecting a call from my wife.

      God bless always.

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  5. Here's a third person who doesn't answer the phone unless she knows who is calling!

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    1. Seems to be it is what I should do also, Kathy.

      God bless.

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  6. Dearest Victor,
    Yes, such persisting callers are oh so annoying.
    You should keep a whistle on your side, and then, with not too much of tomato sauce in your mouth, when you blow it as forceful as you manage. That will give them an earful and a few seconds to 'think'...
    Hugs,
    Mariette

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    1. That is a very clever trick, Mariette. I'll bear it in mind. I sometimes talk to them in a foreign language. In French or Italian.

      God bless.

      Delete
  7. Those calls are an annoyance. We don't have a choice of electric company, we do have a choice of other things, and mostly politicians trying to get votes calling. We just don't answer.

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    1. Oh yes ... politicians. We have them calling at your door over here.

      God bless, Mimi.

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