Wednesday, 9 January 2019

Mean Old Trout

I don't know if it is the same where you live, but here in the UK, when a couple are getting married they prepare a Wedding Gift List. This is a list of all the items they need to set up home together. Guests pick an item they'd like to purchase, tell the couple, and it is crossed off the list. So be quick to choose the cheap items like "a bottle opener" otherwise other people will choose the cheap item and you'll have to buy an expensive one.

In this electronic day and age, a number of shops have prepared wedding lists on their websites. The couple to be married tell their guests where to access the list of their chosen shop. Guests go on the internet, choose a gift and pay for it, and the shop delivers it on the wedding day. I don't like this idea because it ties you down to the shop the couple have chosen, and some greedy couples will choose the most expensive shop, whereas I could buy them the same item from a garage sale at a cheaper price. Admittedly it will need cleaning a bit; but who cares. When you get married happiness is above all else; not gifts!

When I got married I did not want to prepare a list; but tradition is tradition after all.

The list proved useless. Not one guest bought us anything from our list. I had asked for a new house, a car, a luxury holiday, jewelleries, and similar small trinkets. But instead we got toasters, ironing boards, kettles, tea pots and similar small items. Let's face it, the price of a toaster is much much less than the guests would have consumed in food and drinks at our wedding. So I was out of pocket from the start. I remember it cost us a fortune getting my favourite hamburger bar to prepare all those meals with French fries and milk shakes.

Now many years later, I have grown older and wiser. I tell friends and family not to give us Christmas presents; but if anyone breaks the agreement and gives us something anyway, I wait until after Christmas and buy them something in the winter sales. Either that, or recycle some present that someone else has given us.

It's surprising how many good things you can buy in the sales. The other day I bought a shirt from the shop. The sign said "20% OFF" so it was a bargain. When I got home I found out they had cut the sleeves off.

What is the most useless present you have received?

PHOTO FROM OUR WEDDING
Ah ... but WERE they strapless dresses or ... ... ... 

22 comments:

  1. In the North East states of the US people tend to give money as a gift and the cost of a wedding and honeymoon often rely of those gifts, In the South they all give gifts. When I married (several times) my southern friends and relatives asked where we were registered. I told them Bank of America! We got toasters anyway.

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    1. I like the idea you have in the North East, JoeH. Here in the UK the cost of a wedding can run into £ks The wedding dress alone can cost about £2k. That is why I refused to wear one; but my wife insisted she should!

      We too got toasters and electrical goods we did not need anyway since we were already in a house. What we needed was a yacht or a world cruise. Did not get either.

      God bless.

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  2. That photo is a hoot, Victor! The most useless gift? I hate to say this, because the sentiment behind it was heartfelt, but it was a garishly ornate, and very large, cross. I don't think the rugged cross our Lord died upon looked anything like that. I think I gave it to a thrift shop . . .
    Blessings!

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    1. That's the sad thing Martha. People choose gifts thinking they are nice and appropriate; yet when we receive them they are not to our taste or style.

      One of our wedding gifts (suggestion), from a friend of ours whose job it was, was a tattoo "His" and "Hers" somewhere private. We chose to turn it down and suggested he tattoos himself there instead.

      As for the photo ... you should have been where I was ... at the front.

      God bless.

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  3. TOO funny! The honors for 'most useless' gift has to go to my former boss: A bag of coffee beans from Starbucks. She commented, "You DO have a coffee grinder at home, don't you?" (That would be no …)

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    1. I understand what you mean, Mevely. What makes people think these are clever well-thought gifts? Like a garlic press for instance? As if we needed such a contraption.

      God bless you.

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  4. I laughed out loud at Joeh's comment! I have received some useless gifts, but they are long gone and someone else's treasure now. They were so useless I cannot even remember what they were!
    Blessings!

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    1. I tend to re-cycle useless unwanted gifts. I note who we got it from and give it to someone else. A trick I learnt from my parents when they left me on so many doorsteps.

      God bless you Lulu.

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  5. that photo is hilarious! I remember the good gifts but there have been some bad ones which don't come to mind.

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    1. All the good gifts I like are edible. Others are mostly re-cycled.

      The photo was better taken from the front.

      God bless you Christine.

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  6. Very funny! I once got a lamp and never understood why. It came with no shade. I ended up bringing it to the charity shop. I haven't thought about that for years. It was a big brown lamp. I hope somebody liked it and used it. Weird stuff happens. :)

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    1. You've reminded me Bill. (Thanx for that). The most useless gift was a bedside lamp which was sound operated. You clap and it went on and off. Also ... it did so every time I farted ... so I got rid of it.

      Thanx for your sense of humour, Bill. God bless.

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  7. Cute post, Victor! Love the photo:)
    I once received a small battery operated plastic flower in a pot that did a little dance when activated. It doesn't happen too often, but I was at a loss for words.

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    1. I know the one you mean, Chris. A friend of ours has one. Most odd indeed. His, I believe, is solar powered battery operated. Why do people invent such things? Why do people buy them?

      I have invented an edible cookery book. You read the recipe, tear off the page and eat it. It is impregnated with the appropriate flavours of the meal you read about. When you finish all you have left is the covers; so you buy another book.

      I sent it to my publisher and he ate it.

      God bless.

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  8. People here also register at stores for gifts but a lot of people also give money.
    No useless give that I've received comes to mind.

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    1. Sometimes the store gift list is quite expensive.

      God bless, Happyone.

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  9. We were from a rural area. at our shower, three families gave us an electric skillet $25. The irony was they were the well-to-do families of the area.

    Most useless gift? A small glass vase.

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    1. Oh yes Susan ... the selection of vases and ornamental statuettes we have received ...

      God bless.

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  10. I think it's much wiser what we do here in the Northeast of the US. As Joeh said above, we give money to offset the cost of the wedding. We might supplement it with a side gift too, but something meaningful.

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    1. Hey, it's great to see you visiting here again Manny. Thanx.

      Yes, I agree. What you do in the NE is sensible.

      God bless.

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  11. Sometimes you can be incorrigible, Victor!! Thanks always for the giggles!

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    1. Moi? Incorrigible? What have I done this time?

      God bless you, Terri.

      Delete

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