Signs of the Times

 

Sign over a Gynaecologist’s Office: "Dr. Jones, at your cervix."

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  In a Podiatrist's office: "Time wounds all heels."

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On a Septic Tank Truck: Yesterday's Meals on Wheels

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On a Plumber’s truck: "We repair what your husband fixed."

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On another Plumber's truck: "Don't sleep with a drip. Call your plumber."

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On a Church's Bill board: "7 days without God makes one weak."

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At a Tyre Store: "Invite us to your next blowout."

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On an Electrician's truck: "Let us remove your shorts."

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In a Non-smoking Area: "If we see smoke, we will assume you are on fire and take appropriate action."

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On a Maternity Room door: "Push. Push. Push."

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At an Optometrist's Office: "If you don't see what you're looking for, you've come to the right place."

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On a Taxidermist's window: "We really know our stuff."

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On a Fence: "Salesmen welcome! Dog food is expensive!"

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At a Car Dealership: "The best way to get back on your feet - miss a car payment."

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Outside a Car Exhaust Store: "No appointment necessary. We hear you coming."

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In a Vets waiting room: "Be back in 5 minutes. Sit! Stay!"

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In a Restaurant window: "Don't stand there and be hungry; come on in and get fed up."

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In the front yard of a Funeral Home: "Drive carefully. We'll wait."

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And don't forget the sign at a Radiator's Shop: "Best place in town to take a leak."

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Sign on the back of yet another Septic Tank Truck: "Caution - This Truck is full of Political Promises"

Signs of the times

 

Sign over a Gynaecologist’s Office:
"Dr Jones, at your cervix."

**************************
  In a Podiatrist's office:
"Time wounds all heels."

**************************
On a Septic Tank Truck:
Yesterday's Meals on Wheels

**************************
On a Plumber’s truck:
"We repair what your husband fixed."

**************************
On another Plumber's truck:
"Don't sleep with a drip. Call your plumber."

**************************
On a Church's Bill board:
"7 days without God makes one weak."

**************************
At a Tyre Store
"Invite us to your next blowout."

**************************
On an Electrician's truck:
"Let us remove your shorts."

**************************
In a Non-smoking Area:
"If we see smoke, we will assume you are on fire and take appropriate action."

**************************

On a Maternity Room door:

"Push. Push. Push."

**************************
At an Optometrist's Office:
"If you don't see what you're looking for, you've come to the right place."

**************************

On a Taxidermist's window:

"We really know our stuff."

**************************

On a Fence:

"Salesmen welcome! Dog food is expensive!"

**************************
At a Car Dealership:
"The best way to get back on your feet - miss a car payment."

**************************
Outside a Car Exhaust Store:
"No appointment necessary. We hear you coming."

**************************

In a Vets waiting room:

"Be back in 5 minutes. Sit! Stay!"

**************************
In a Restaurant window:
"Don't stand there and be hungry; come on in and get fed up."

**************************
In the front yard of a Funeral Home:
"Drive carefully. We'll wait."

**************************
And don't forget the sign at a RADIATOR SHOP:
"Best place in town to take a leak."

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……… and the best till last

Sign on the back of yet another Septic Tank Truck:

"Caution - This Truck is full of Political Promises"

Signs Of The Times

 

 

Wherever you go these days you see signs everywhere. Traffic signs, road signs, adverts, signs in shop windows, outside churches, on the side of buses, vans and cars. Almost everywhere. Here are some I saw recently. On the motorway:

Here are a few other signs I noticed in my travels:

 

On a plumber's truck: "We repair what your husband fixed."

At an Optometrist's Office: "If you don't see what you're looking for, you've come to the right place."

On a fence: "Salesmen welcome. Dog food is expensive!"

At a Walmart store: “Win a free ride in a Police car just by shoplifting from this store.”

At the Vet's waiting room: "Be back in 5 minutes.  Sit!  Stay!"

At a Car Exhaust store:  "No appointment necessary.  We hear you coming."   

On a Church bill board: "Seven days without God makes one weak."

Outside a Church: “Honk if you like Jesus. Text whilst driving if you like to meet Him.”

Outside a tattoo shop:

Outside a pub:

On the side of a bus:

Whilst on holiday in Paris last year I entered a small restaurant and hit my head against a low doorway. I was taken to hospital. The doctor asked me, "Did you not see the warning sign in the restaurant?"

I said, "Yes I did, But I cannot read French!"

Boo boom ... Tskshhh (Sound of drum and cymbals!).