I would not get operated there again. The anaesthetic did not work. I woke up during the operation and the doctors and nurses were playing poker round the operating table.
CINEMA REVIEW - * One star
I went in to see the Sound of Music, my favourite film. I hated it. The seats were too hard and the cinema was overcrowded. If the woman in-front of me did not have pierced ears I would not have been able to see the screen.
RESTAURANT REVIEW - ** Two stars
The music was good. The steak was very hard. When I told the waiter he got me a sharper knife.
HOLIDAY REVIEW - * One star
It was hot every day, and the beach was too sandy. There was sand everywhere when I sat down in my bikini. My boy friend complained too. He was wearing baggy shorts.
PARIS VISIT REVIEW - *** Three stars
Paris is beautiful. We walked everywhere and visited all the tourist sites. One drawback though. The Eiffel Tower was not leaning to one side as it showed in the brochure. Maybe they fixed it.
RESTAURANT REVIEW - * One star
Food excellent. Wine excellent. Service second to none. After the meal my girl-friend broke up with me. I shall never visit this place again!
RESTAURANT REVIEW - **** Four stars
I liked this restaurant a lot, and the food. But the waiter had big ears.
CHURCH REVIEW - * One star
Never been to that church before. I went for a colleague's funeral. Wi-Fi reception bad. Missed Downton Abbey on my laptop. Priest too serious.
IKEA REVIEW - ***** Five stars
Great shop. I'd read that 17% of babies are conceived in IKEA beds. My girl-friend and I tried the bed and we got thrown out of the shop.