Halloween

 

I was in France many years ago when I was young. I stayed at an auberge in Paris just by the river. For those who don't know, an auberge is not a large aubergine; it is a small hotel with a pub and restaurant all in one. I remember a man had drunk so much that he fell into the river. He was in Seine!

Anyway, back to my story. That night as I lay in bed in my small auberge room I heard a noise. I sat up and a frisson went down my spine - I guess in London it would have been a shudder. I ran towards the door to reach the communal bathroom and I tripped on something on my way out.

It was a ghost. Not a small ghost, but the ghost of a fully grown small man. He told me, in French, that his name was Too Loose LeTrick. 

I'd never met a French speaking ghost. I always assumed they spoke in English. Although as I recall, a friend of mine said he met an Italian speaking ghost when communicating on a Luigi Board once. All he got from him was a recipe for pasta.

Back to my story. The French ghost, Too Loose Le Trick, told me that when he was alive he had studied to be a doctor, but he was so short he could not see above his patients' knees. So he became a chiropodist instead. 

I was very frightened at seeing such an apparition, small as it was, and I was desperate to go to the bathroom. I must have cried a little because I felt tears trickling down my leg. 

He was polite and tried to communicate in English. "Are you zee frightened monsieur?" he asked.

"Oui ... un peu ... a little" I mumbled.

"Moi aussi ..." he said, "me too ... I am zee afraid of my wife ... Madame Penoir. She eez zee big monster all zee ways complaining." 

At this point a clock somewhere struck 10:35pm.

"Oh ... I must go to my wife," he said. "she gets veree upset when I am zee late! I tell her zat I am haunting tourists in old auberges; but she eez not believing me. She says she can see right through me!"

And with that he vanished.

HAPPY HALLOWEEN