Daylight Robbery

 

The police are looking for two robbers who have been terrorising the town of Glazier for the last few weeks. They work in tandem and have been identified on camera as Ivan Eye-Glass and Ivor Monocle. Whilst one man distracts home-owners by engaging in conversation pretending he is a door-to-door window cleaner; his colleague gets to the back of the house and steals their windows.

Mr Walter Vision from 72 Acacia Avenue said, "I was having a shower when I heard a noise and suddenly my window was gone. Where once there was a window now there is just a gaping aperture, a big hole in the wall. I have nowhere to hang my curtains. They were left in a pile on the floor!" 

Miss Curley Blonde reported that she was driving her car through the car wash when suddenly her car was flooded with soapy water. The thieves had stolen her car windows whist she was in motion.

There have been reports of missing windows all over town. The opticians in the High Street, I Lash, have had their shop window stolen and all the glasses in the shop window have had the lenses missing. "All we have now is a lot of frames with no lenses," he said. "This is not enough evidence to frame the culprits," he added later.

Sales of new replacement windows have gone through the roof. "There's more demand than we can supply," said the owner of the business, "because all our windows stock has been stolen and all we have is an empty warehouse. Even the windows in our building have gone."

"If this continues, we will have a world with no windows," said an expert speaking through a hole in his house, "and who knows what a window-less world would reveal!"

So beware what you do behind closed windows with curtains drawn. Your deeds may well be known to all.