Wednesday 23 March 2022

Do you remember me?

 

Groucho Marx once said: I never forget a face, but in your case I'll be glad to make an exception.

I sympathise with his views on this, and indeed I agree with a lot of his humourous sayings.

Whenever I meet some people I have not seen for a while, at parties for instance, they approach me and start a conversation as if we've never been separated over the years. They start talking about this and that and all the time I'm trying to remember who they are, what is their name, and where and when we first or last met and in what circumstances.

They prattle on and I'm half-listening, nodding politely and smiling and saying things like "how interesting ... I never knew that ... I understand ..." and other meaningless phrases whilst I try to remember who the hell they are.

I sometimes, politely of course, break off the conversation and say something like, "must circulate ... we need to catch up again some other time", and then I go to other people at the party and ask surreptitiously who that person I was speaking to is. Often I am told their name and I am none the wiser as to who they are or where I met them.

Now then, it is not really my fault if I forget a face or a name is it? Somehow, there's something in my brain which stops me from remembering certain information. Perhaps my brain defines the information as low priority and like a computer it deletes it or confines it to an archive file rarely accessed or read.

The fact is, I don't remember certain faces or names, especially at parties, and particularly after a few drinks. 

So why is it this man got a little angry when, at a party last week, I did not know who he was. He went on and on talking and talking and after half-an-hour or so I could not recall who he was.

My brain started asking me questions: "Was he the guide at the local sewage works where we went for our annual works outing? Our company always arranges an annual event for the staff to thank them for their good work. Last year it was a picnic at the sewage works. Was this man our guide, I wonder?"

"Did I meet him in prison perhaps? I did a tour of a prison up North as part of my job and met a number of staff there. Is he one of those people, or an ex-prisoner perhaps? But then, what is he doing at this party miles away here in London?"

"I know ... he is the man who got his head stuck in the railings in my aunt's metal garden fence. I always try to remember fences, more than I remember people. So please don't take offence should we meet and I don't remember you. I remember his ears well. They stuck out like an elephant's and held his head stuck in the fence!"

As I was trying to think clearly, having downed at least two whiskies, he noticed my glazed look and said, "You don't remember me do you?"

I was taken aback by this sudden assault and leant forwards almost losing my footing and falling over him.

"I'm really saddened and affronted," he said, "you don't remember me. We went to school together and when aged twelve we used to steal apples from the Convent and Sister Anastasia caught us once and told Father Emeritus."

"Oh ..." I said, trying to remember who Sister Anastasia was and who is Father Emeritus. Why is my brain letting me down after only three whiskies?

Then he gave me an opening when he said, "I remember you. You're Quentin, you're Horatio's twin brother and we were in the same class at school!"

I must admit that for a while I had to think hard whether I was Quentin or not. I don't remember having a twin brother. My parents never told me. I remember them calling me many names as I grew up, but Quentin was not one of them.

"Actually," I slurred my words with some authority, "I am not Quentin!"

"You must be Horatio then," he insisted, "you two always looked identical."

"Nope ... not Horatio either!" I said with more than a modicum of satisfaction.         

 "Who are you then?" he asked in exasperation

"I'm really saddened and affronted," I said, "that you don't remember me. Now we're even and both saddened and affronted! Nice to have met you. Must circulate. Great party this. I like parties because I always meet new and interesting people at parties."




30 comments:

  1. Ah! It's ALL coming out now....
    Stealing apples from a Convent..That's a double
    Mortal sin..
    I never stole no apples from no place..! Bananas?
    Yes! Apples..NO! :). HeHe!

    Everybody knows me..Willie..in my own town, a few
    other local towns, were ever l go..people know
    me..speak to me..how they recognize me wearing a
    mask..? I'll never know..HeHe! I usually have to
    ask them to pull their mask down so l know who
    l'm greeting..! But! Then l get stopped by complete
    strangers..wanting to know..Who? or What? l am! :).

    I should give up going to parties Victor..There ALL
    a bore anyway..go to Mothercare..much more fun.....
    "Willie, Mothercare does'nt exist any more" "Oh"!

    God! Created 'boring' people to be rude to...they are
    a fine example, and they ALL have the IQ of a rocking
    horse..! But! Then..l'm rude to everyone..l just have
    the knack of getting away with it...! Just the way
    l tell'em..! :O).
    I may forget a name..but..but..never forget a face..!
    🌟 🍪 🥛 🍴 🎀 🌟 🍪 🥛 🍴 🎀 🌟 🍪 🥛 🍴 🎀 🌟

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I never stole any apples from any Convent. It must have been Quentin or Horatio. And I am not either of them.

      God bless, Willie.

      Delete
    2. HaHa! Never~the~less...you will say
      three Our Fathers 'AND' three Hail Marys..
      Then..Go and sin no more..or l'll send
      the boys round..! Bless! :O).

      Delete
  2. It's so embarrassing for me when I forget a name or face at a gathering, Victor, but it does happen from time to time. As you quote yourself here, it's okay to forget the face of a person, but not the face of Jesus.
    Blessings!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. It is difficult when one cannot remember the person we're speaking to. It's worse when that person knows us well.

      God bless, Martha.

      Delete
  3. Good comeback to that rude person who insisted you were someone else.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. For a moment I too thought I was someone else.

      God bless, Kathy.

      Delete
  4. It is hard to concentrate when a line recalls something. I was with my brother in law at a eating joint one night, a man walked up and spoke to Sonny. Sonny said, "I know I know you, but I cannot remember!"
    The man said, "I'm Bill your mail man we speak every morning, even this morning!"

    Yeah I fit in that category also.
    Love from here..
    Sherry & jack

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. We meet so many people in life and we cannot possibly be expected to remember them all. How many people recognise their wives when they put all that cream on their face at bedtime???

      God bless, Jack and Sherry.

      Delete
  5. Dearest Victor,
    Guess we all have that and while traveling or on the road, whatever we run into people and talk friendly with them and examine our 'mind' about who-the-hell is he/she?! Sure, only a minute after parting we DO remember! But guess that happens to ALL of us.
    Hugs,
    Mariette

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I think everyone should wear a badge with their name all the time so that at least we might remember who they are. Sometimes, even with a name, I can't remember where I met that person.

      God bless you, Mariette.

      Delete
  6. I know that face but I can't remember the name.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I couldn't even remember the name as well as the face.

      God bless, Bill.

      Delete
    2. Isn’t it interesting that people who annoyed you in the past also annoy you in the present? It is my guess that you didn’t care for his ways in the past either. I liked the answer you gave this person, (jerk). Oops, that was not nice. Blessings

      Delete
    3. The thing is, I did not even know him in the past. He thought I was Quentin or Horatio. I thought I was neither of these.

      God bless, Nells.

      Delete
  7. We meet so many people in a life time, we are bound not to remember everyone.
    I love the meeting Jesus saying!!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Thank you Happyone. We should never forget Jesus.

      God bless.

      Delete
  8. Great retort, Victor. I'm immeasurably happy in retirement, no longer having to attend those sorts of meaningless functions.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. It's what I hated the most, Mevely. Having to attend those functions and being polite and pretending I was enjoying the company I was with. Some people were boring and were born that way. Others had studied all their lives on how to be boring.

      God bless always.

      Delete
  9. Some people have a face only a mother could remember.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. ... a mother could remember and regret. Why do some mothers have boring children?

      God bless, Mimi.

      Delete
  10. Over our lifetime we do meet so many people ... some we are happy to remember while some we'd rather forget!

    I usually have a good memory for names and faces.

    Happy Thursday Wishes.

    All the best Jan

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I guess we remember best those who have been kind to us.

      Best wishes always, Jan. God bless.

      Delete
  11. I am terrible with names. When golfing I usually get paired off with people I don't know. I make a point during the introductions to always repeat the persons name. I'm Joe, your name is Dave, nice to meet you Dave, do you play here often Dave?

    By the second hole I have forgotten what's his names name.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Yes, I share your problem, JoeH. Especially with people I meet for a short period and then don't see them again for a long time.

      God bless you and yours.

      Delete
  12. I forget names unless I meet that person at least every week, but I think forgetting faces is easier to do if we only see a person a few times with many years in between. Faces change. They may be fatter or thinner, hair may be totally different or gone altogether, and then there are the wrinkles! so you are quite within your rights to say "I don't recall your name, refresh my memory?"

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Last week for instance, I met someone I had not seen for twenty years. Last time I saw him he was a new born baby. Now he is grown up with a beard, tattoos and ear rings. I did not recognise him.

      God bless, River.

      Delete

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