Birmingham.
You have selected London.
No ... I said Birmingham. Bir Ming Ham!
Please state the date you wish to travel from your local station to London.
No ... not London. BIR MING HAM.
You have selected Swansea. Please state the date you wish to travel from your local station to Swansea.
I don't want to travel to Swansea. I want to go BIRMINGHAM.
You can select the date by entering on your keypad the day, month and year of your intended travel as follows - DD/MM/YYYY then press the # key.
It's pointless me pressing on this stupid keypad. We have not agreed the destination yet.
You have selected the 32nd day of the 13th month in the year 2525.
No I haven't you stupid machine. I just hit my phone with my fist.
You have just called me stupid. We do not tolerate verbal abuse from our customers. Only from management.
Wait a minute ... if you're a machine, how did you know I called you stupid.
Ooops ... faux pas. Please ignore what I have just said. Please speak clearly and state your desired travel destination.
This is not an automated machine. You're a human aren't you?
No I am not. Please speak clearly and state your desired travel destination.
Yes you are. A machine would not have known I said stupid and would not answer me back like you just did.
Yes it would.
No it wouldn't.
Yes it would. It would. It would.
All right. If you're a machine tell me the time of the first train from my local station to Birmingham. That's BIR MING HAM. Not London, or Swansea or any where else. BIRMINGHAM.
Wait a minute. I'll look it up!
Look it up? You're supposed to be an automated computerised machine with all the timetables on your database. What do you mean look it up?
Well, sometimes the pages in this timetable stick together as I search for the destination. How do you spell Birmingham? Does it start with the letter D?
HaHa! Birmingham! :(
ReplyDeleteWho? Wants to go to Birmingham..
I went there once, my brother~in~law
took me back in 73..1973..first married,
my wife came from Stafford..we went to
Birmingham..to the 'OLD' Bullring..as it
was then..what a ****hole..! Yuk! Filth!
Dirty! and ALL that went with it..! :(.
Looked like a war zone..and believe me
l know what one looks like..!
Probably a lot nicer and cleaner now! I
have 'NO' intentions of going to find out..!
I had a set~to with O2 last Monday week, my
top up card, won't work in the Spar shop l
always go to once a month to top up!
I phone three different numbers..recorded
voices..l explained the problem, and this
voice kept saying.."We do not understand,
please answer Yes! or No!".
In the end, l phoned O2 shop in Poole, she
said l should go down, with my card and phone..
Cut a long story short...It was'nt my card at all,
but the machine in the Spar shop that was faulty.
So l was suffering anxiety and stress for two days! :(.
There's very few companies that you can actually
speak to a 'Human Being'..it's ALL recorded voices,
push button, pigeon..and so on..!
At least when you pray to God, you get an answer...
At least l do..Well mostly..! :O). Hello! Hello!
❀ヅ❤♫ ❀ヅ❤♫ ¯\_(⊙︿⊙)_/¯ ❀ヅ❤♫ ❀ヅ❤♫
It is so frustrating when talking to a machine rather than a proper person. I like the ending of your comment.
DeleteGod bless, Willie.
...I hate talking to computers!
ReplyDeleteI agree. It is so impersonal.
DeleteGod bless, Tom.
I agree with you, Willie, and Tom. I don't talk to hardware.
ReplyDeleteSometimes it is the only option with UK companies.
DeleteGod bless, Giorgio.
We always enjoy visiting, today I don't feel too much like commenting, so I am canning my comment, and pasting after I read.
ReplyDeleteI appreciate your patience.
jack with Sherry watching LOL she reads but will not comment. LOL I think that makes her a lurker! ;-) But a sweet one...
I hope and pray you are both well my friends.
DeleteGod bless, Jack and Sherry.
LOLOLOL ... I was just IN Birmingham yesterday. And the day before that!
ReplyDeleteYour telephone exchange isn't too far removed from what I enjoyed (NOT) last night with a Verizon rep.
Sometimes those stupid "talk to" computerised machines are the only way to communicate with some organisations. Some techie companies over here don't even accept e-mails from customers. Phone call or nothing.
DeleteI wonder if your Birmingham is like ours!
God bless, Mevely.
No button to push to talk to a real person. What is a real person anyway, you have all this amazing technology you don't need a person. :)
ReplyDeleteOften the query with an organisation cannot be explained in YES/NO computerised algorithms that some firms have programmed on their answering service. That's when I need a real person to talk to. Also, some firms don't accept e-mails where you can explain your problem more fully.
DeleteGod bless you, Bill.
If you ever come to Swansea do give me a call!
ReplyDeleteThank you so much, Liz. It's such a long time since I visited Swansea on business.
DeleteGod bless always.
I think we've all been there a time or two!!!
ReplyDeleteAnnoying modern machines.
DeleteGod bless, Happyone.
It's a shame we can't program our own computers to talk back to their computers. That would be funny.
ReplyDeleteI have changed my welcoming message on my telephone answering machine to sound like a computer. It says: If you need to speak to me PRESS 1. My wife: PRESS 2 then I name the children, the dog, the cat, the rabbit and so on PRESS 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, ... 99 and so on.
DeleteGod bless, Mimi.
I used to hate automated answers and always hung up, then found the information online. Now I don't even try and straightaway go online.
ReplyDeleteSome firms don't accept online messages or e-mails, River.
DeleteGod bless.