Wednesday 9 March 2022

A sad story with a happy ending.

 

This is a sad story with hopefully a happy ending. I can't wait to read it to the end to find out how it ends.

There once was a sad hamster called Apple Pie with Vanilla Ice Cream. Well, with a name like that you can hardly wonder why this sad hamster was always forlorn and desolate. As miserable as a pub with no beer; only worse.

His owners tried their best to cheer him up, filling his cage with goodies and presents like a big wheel that turned round and round by an electric motor so he no longer had to turn it himself. He could just sit there and see it go round. 

They also put his cage next to a TV permanently tuned to a cooking channel so he could enjoy various recipes being created and enjoyed by happy people. 

They read him many stories to widen his interest. From books like Hugo's Les Miserable, or Crime and Punishment, to the most boring Shakespeare plays they could think of. They thought that by sharing in other peoples' misery their beloved hamster would cheer up and realise how well-off he was by comparison.

But no, that did not work. The hamster remained miserable and sad and forlorn in no particular order. He would eat very little and grew thinner, and thinner, and thinner, and thinner still.

At one point he just sat there not moving in the corner of his cage for days. His owners took him to the vet fearing the worst. The vet discovered that the hamster had swallowed a fridge magnet and was stuck to the cage.

After a short operation the hamster returned home to recuperate. His owners let him out of the cage to roam free hoping this would cheer him up. But things got worse even more.

The hamster took to drink, and started smoking and being rude to people by giving them hand signals and swearing. He became all cantankerous and grumpy and cranky as some people do when they have no hope, joy and faith in their lives.

(As an aside: I once knew three women called Hope, Joy and Faith. They made me happy but that's another story.)

His owners took the hamster to a dog psychiatrist called Woof Woof. He suggested that the hamster perhaps needed a partner to keep him company. He offered to sell them his St Bernard dog but they turned the offer down because they could not get the dog to fit inside the hamster cage. Instead, they bought a parrot called Gregory Peck. This made matters even worse because the parrot would sit in the cage and tell the hamster sad stories about how miserable the world is and how it would get even worse.

In total despair the hamster left the cage, and the house where he lived with his owners and ran out in the street. He decided to take up golf instead as a pastime and to get a bit of fresh air. Whilst out one day, he got hit in the head by a flying golf ball and was knocked unconscious.

When he woke up he remembered nothing of his past life and became cheerful and happy and joyful like never before. He went forward in life and never looked back again. Because if you look back you're likely to walk into lamp posts or trees. Or fall in a golf hole.

27 comments:

  1. HeHe! Definitely a hole in one Victor..! :).

    When my daughter was 5~8 she had a hamster,
    two in fact over that period, as they don't
    live that long..two to perhaps three years..
    One used to cling onto the inside of it's
    cage door, trying to rattle it open..day in,
    day out..always the same..it had biceps like
    a body~builder..! :).
    Anyway! One morning we noticed it was 'GONE'
    flown the nest..it finally broke the cage door
    and was...'GONE'..! :(.
    Now! Three weeks later me and my daughter were
    watching the TV..something educational, like
    'Robin Hood'..low and behold..from under the
    gas fire came the said hamster..sorry forgot
    to say, it's name was Hammy..unusual for a
    hamster! :).
    It was very thin of course, caught him, put
    him back in his cage, which was waiting for
    his return, secured the cage door with a
    cloths peg..! Job done!
    During that night upstairs in bed, l could
    here it rattling the cage door..HeHe! I
    thought..Oh! Well..at least he's happy..! :O).
    🐹 🐹 🐹 🐹 🐹 🐹 🐹 🐹 🐹 🐹
    PS..
    I've called the hamster 'IT' as l don't go round
    looking at animals backsides..to see what sex it
    is..let alone a hamster! :O).

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Hamsters make wonderful pets. So lucky you found yours in time.

      God bless, Willie.

      Delete
    2. https://justhamsters.net/do-hamsters-go-to-heaven/

      Delete
  2. ...there can be value reflecting on the past, but looking ahead to the prize is more important.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I agree, Tom. Unless the prize is behind us and we've missed it. Like leaving a good job, or a relationship. For example, I left the kitchen for one minute to answer the phone and the dog ate my pizza. With hindsight, I should have eaten the pizza and let the dog answer the phone.

      God bless.

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  3. Poor little guy. If I were forced to cohabitate with a parrot, I'd run away, as well. Maybe amnesia's not such a bad thing?

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Can you imagine? Being with a parrot which repeats things over and over again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and ...

      God bless, Mevely.

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  4. A parrot would drive me crazy. My mother had one and it used to scream alot so she covered his cage with a towel He poked holes in the towel and stuck his head out and screamed. I would have to get rid of him if it were me. She had him for 25+ years.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I once ate roasted parrot in a posh restaurant. It kept repeating on me.

      God bless, Bill.

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  5. I think a lot of us are waiting to get hit in the head. LOL Money could have been saved by not getting a parrot, the tv could have been tuned to the news and sad stories would have come regularly.
    Thanks for the entertainment, glad the story ended well.
    love sent from over here.
    Sherry & jack

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. That is so true, Jack. So many things are obvious to mankind yet we continue to make the same mistakes in life at our cost and that of others.

      God bless you and Sherry.

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  6. Hamsters are fun, but short-lived. If i had one and he was sad, i'd let him go so he'd be happy.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Are hamsters edible? Do they taste of ham? Or chicken?

      God bless, Mimi.

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    2. Yes, that little hamster-like creature
      you had as a childhood pet is somewhat
      of a delicacy in the Andean highlands
      and has been a traditional part of the
      Peruvian and Bolivian diets since
      pre-colonial times....Bon Appetit..! :).

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    3. Thanx Willie. I wonder what it tastes like? Does it taste like chicken?

      God bless.

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    4. Hamsters like Guinea pigs taste awful..
      Bitter and rather tough..they both need
      hours of cooking..
      I've also eaten rat..softer, sweeter
      meat..once you get the skin off the rat,
      there's nowt wrong with pushing onto a
      skewer, then on the Barby or under the grill..!

      Delete
  7. At least he's a happy hamster in the end. :)

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I wonder, did the hamster ever realise that he was sad, or is it the way his face looked?

      God bless, Happyone.

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  8. Silly people should have read him happy stories and played with him instead, then he would still be there cheering them up as they cheered him.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Good point River. Do to others as you want them to do to you.

      God bless.

      Delete
  9. Sounds like a happy ending to me, Victor, although the poor little guy can't recall what life was like before.
    Blessings!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Sometimes it is better not to dwell on our past and its problems, Martha. We learn from them though.

      God bless you.

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  10. Dearest Victor,
    Quite a hamster adventure!
    Well told and written.
    Hugs,
    Mariette

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Thank you, Mariette. The hamster was OK in the end.

      God bless.

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    2. I didn’t feel too sorry for the hamster. After all, he had a good ending. Maybe we all need io get hit on the head to straighten us out, so we can see how blessed we really are. Thanks for the entertainment. God bless.

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    3. You are right Nells. We all need to consider how blessed we really are rather than moan about our lives.

      God bless always.

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